To every TBM leader who tries to justify this:

Stick it up your ass. No way. In no time. Is this appropriate. Fuck you and the horse you rode in on. And if you honestly believe your God approved this, then I think you can both pack sand.

"But he didn't have sex with them . . ." I don't give a shit. His followers and other profits did.

End of conversation. I don't want to talk about the book of Abraham, a mall, or your dumbass essays. Consider any 14 year old girl you know, now picture any 38 year old man. Now justify it. Ok cool. Now insert a pencil into your ear and kick it.

Rant over.

This last weekend was eventful. Our son informed us he is gay.

Quick background: My wife and I stopped attending the Mormon church in August 2018 after intense study revealed too much ugliness to endure. We informed our son (RM, back just over a year) and daughter (HS) of our concerns. Our son continued to attend, our daughter stopped attending with us.

We have suspected that our son is gay for a while. As we have transitioned out, we have finally allowed ourselves to critically analyze everything about the church. Our concerns started with historical events but moved to current activities, practices, and policies. The church’s position toward the LGBTQ community was not our primary focus, but the more we learned and examined what they have said and done, the more we were troubled by these issues. Over the last month, my wife has gently expressed our concerns about the church’s stance regarding the LGBTQ community to our son. Her hope was to communicate that we did not agree with or accept the messages coming from church leadership and to establish a safe place for him to open up about his feelings. He remained pretty quiet about everything church related until Sunday night.

Our son approached us with his sister in tow and said he needed to talk. We sat and listened. He started by indicating that he thinks he needs to pull back from the church. I got privately choked up. I felt intense emotion not because I saw it as a victory but because I recognized how much pain and suffering that statement represented. The church has been such an integral part of his life, his identity. Deciding to pull away from the church must have been excruciating for him. I refrained from any emotional display and he continued. He indicated that he needed to pull back due to the church’s treatment of the LGBTQ community because… he is part of that community. Then he simply said, “I’m gay.” He slowly gave us some details about his road of discovery, a road he still travels. He apologized several times during the discussion, he kept saying, “I’m sorry.” We stopped him and told him that we understood why he might be compelled to express those words but he had nothing to apologize for, nothing at all. We told him we love him, we accept him, and that we like him. We thanked him for coming to us and opening up to us about his feelings. We hugged. We offered support. We offered encouragement. I don’t think any of us truly understands what this all means, how significant that night really was, but we pledged to support and love each other. We are a family, united, together. My son is gay.

Edit to add: I am sitting at my desk at work staring at a blurry computer screen because my eyes are filled with tears. Thank you for the expressed love and support of our family. Thank you for the kind words. Thank you for the virtual hugs. The compassion and acceptance expressed by this community is phenomenal! Thank you all.

Edit to add: I am overwhelmed by the response to this post. I never dreamed it would produce such a wonderful reaction. Thank you again for all the kind words, love and support, and advice. It is all very meaningful and impactful to me and my family. Thank you all.

Most folks on this sub are suffering from religious trauma from getting out of a high-demand religion. Some are still trying to get out. Coming on this sub if you’ve never experienced Mormonism and aren’t here to learn or to support people on their journeys—even if their journeys them to atheism—is out of line.

So asking “out of curiosity” if we have found religion and then using the comments sections to spread Christianity is gross. We are all in vulnerable positions here and that behavior is exploitative.

Making aggressive anti-Mormon, pro-Christian posts and dissing on atheists and agnostics is even worse.

We’re all here to support each other and learn. Current Mormons, NOM’s, PIMO’s, Exmo’s, and nevermo’s have made an awesome little ecosystem of acceptance, empathy, and hope here. I love it. I think most of us here do. If you feel that your religion is that kind of place too, that’s wonderful. Truly I love that for you. Just please find better places to introduce people to it. Just please, for the love of God, do it in an ethical way.