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u/nekowolf Aug 15 '19
We decided to create my friend’s family in the sims. He was the oldest of eight (we had to limit the family to eight so two of the kids weren’t created). We couldn’t afford a big enough house so there were beds in the back yard and a bathtub in the front. In the end, the father died, the mom left, the children were all taken away by CPS, and my friend married his sister.
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u/tiny_rick__ Aug 15 '19
I enjoyed that story. Do you have another one?
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u/nekowolf Aug 15 '19
I was helping my friend move across the country when the transmission in the moving van blew out and we had to get it towed. While sitting in the cab of the tow truck, the driver goes “so my son’s marrying my stepdaughter. Guess there’s nothing I can do about that.”
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u/tsar_kracken Aug 15 '19
Just like the simulations!
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Aug 15 '19
This is nothing like the simulations! People are dying and there's a four armed Lightsaber weilding cyborg with tuberculosis
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u/SgtDangle42 Aug 15 '19
I'm surprised that doesn't happen more often. You probably like women similar to your mom, and you're probably similar to your dad. Vice-versa for women, and people usually have children about the same age. So if your dad finds a woman similar to your mom and she has a daughter, odds are not low you'll want to bone the stepdaughter.
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u/fuzzybluetriceratops Aug 15 '19
This was an “almost woke the spouse up” laugh
So was it Florida or Alabama?
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u/JosephRBiden Aug 15 '19
There was this guy that didn't do much but he had some money that his dad gave him and lived a carefree life. After a few years of indulging in the bachelor lifestyle he got married and had a son and was happy. Next they had a daughter and she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. His wife figured he was giving their daughter so much attention because she was the baby but when she gave birth to their second son he ignored the new baby and continued to lavish all of his attention on their daughter. The wife still didn't think too much of it until one night when the man called out his daughters name while making love to his wife. "Your names are practically the same" he pleaded but it was obvious to her that her husband didn't just love their daughter, he was in love with and wanted to have sex with their daughter. They divorced soon after. He went on to become president but he still very much wants to bang his daughter.
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u/iCraftDay Aug 15 '19
I also have an experience. My math teacher I created in sims had his birthday party. The guests joined and a family member began making the cake. 20 min pass. The guests leave happily. And now the cake is finished. The math teacher eats it depressed slowly with the family members.
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u/OrionWarrior10 Aug 15 '19
When my brother created my family in the sims my mum cheated on my dad and they divorced, we then drowned the person she was cheating with for obvious reasons, then my brother set himself on fire with the oven and died. This all happened within one play session
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u/JustZodiax Aug 15 '19
Wait, you can run incestious relationships and marriage in The Sims?
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u/nekowolf Aug 15 '19
No. The sims doesn’t let you do familial relationships between adults other than marriage so since we made both him and his sister as adults it didn’t consider them related.
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u/Meritania Aug 15 '19
Is there a Crusader Kings II mod for the Sims? asking for a friend
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Aug 15 '19
How do you marry your sister???
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u/ActionScripter9109 Aug 15 '19
They may have neglected to set up the family relationships in Create-A-Sim at the beginning, so to the game they would have been a valid pairing.
That, or some mods.
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u/Dr_Jabroski Aug 15 '19
Honestly I would be more worried if she didn't do this. I don't think there are many Sims players that didn't have at least one SAW playthrough
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u/zebra8lion Aug 15 '19
Back in Sims one with the making magic expansion, I moved into a creepy house in the magic world and threw several parties that would result in mass drownings. From that point on I lived in a creepy house with a grave yard and ghosts constantly wandering the place. Sims was a masterpiece
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u/OraDr8 Aug 15 '19
You had to kill lots of them for the ghosts. I loved Making magic.
I remember I found a user created mod that basically gave the game pornographic options. Including the fireman shagging the lady of the house after putting out the fire. Hilarious.
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u/razsnazz Aug 15 '19
I'd just lock them in a room and delete the doors. Loved having ghost parties.
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u/janae0728 Aug 15 '19
In high school I made all of the guys I had a crush on in the Sims. Made them hate each other and fight to the death to determine who really got to be with me.
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u/amunra187 Aug 15 '19
Who really got to be with you irl?
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u/Riffington Aug 15 '19 edited Apr 17 '25
quaint thumb consider hard-to-find snails degree reach direful faulty sloppy
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/janae0728 Aug 15 '19
Definitely not a high school crush. Met my husband in my 20s. He's way better than any of those jerks, though realistically I think he would lose a fight to the death irl.
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u/TekoaBull Aug 15 '19
For some background, this was on Sims 2, which had a bug that allowed you to create hideous sims by ignoring the constraints on character creation (think giant noses and beady eyes).
My sister created a house with a graveyard (exactly the way you'd expect) and then created a "family" consisting of one elderly woman and seven extremely ugly toddlers. One of them was named "Scary Mary" and had a face that looked like it had gotten caught in a Hoover.
I can't remember the specifics, but the old lady died and the seven toddlers got taken away by CPS.
I logged on to my "serious" family, which started out as an adult male who I recently got married. I eventually opted to adopt a child, and guess who showed up.
Scary Mary.
After we had a good laugh, I realized that I hadn't saved, and I really didn't want this horrific child. So I drowned her.
Then she came back to haunt my ass until I eventually deleted that family.
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u/Pool_With_No_Ladder Aug 15 '19
Sims can climb out of a pool in The Sims 4, but they can die of embarrassment. So one of the best ways to kill them off is to make them pee their pants while in the middle of proposing.
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u/TheSadisticDragon Aug 15 '19
They can't climb out if there's walls around the pool. Couple that with winter in the Season expansion and you can kill a few dozen sims in just a day.
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u/kaptingavrin Aug 15 '19
Fences. Much better. Use the clear glass fences so they can't get out but you have a very clear view of them as they suffer and die.
Polar plunging to death got patched out pretty quick, though. Was pretty amusing.
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u/Lvl100Magikarp Aug 15 '19
they can also die of anger (enraged)
and playfulness (hysteria)
i killed several npc sims via "enraged"
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u/riku_suave Aug 15 '19
I’m a goddamn idiot, I read SAW and I thought “huh I don’t know this acronym...maybe it’s like a Sims specific play style?” until I realized you mean the Saw movies
Actually I’m still unsure
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u/sfspaulding Aug 15 '19
In your defense Saw (the movie) wasn’t an acronym/shouldn’t be spelled in all caps.
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u/recuerdamoi Aug 15 '19
Me too. I was like, "hmm, don't know what that means, must be game community lingo."
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Aug 15 '19
The one time I played SIMs online I found this house full of girls. They had this big swimming pool inside of their house and convinced me to go swimming. So I jump in and the pool is huge. Eventually I find a ladder and it’s just this small platform full of guys in bathing suits. I had to log out just to get off that island. It was diabolical.
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u/indoobitably Aug 15 '19
Bear skin rugs + fireworks indoors = disappointed mother when she asks why I'm laughing
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u/chunkymilk Aug 15 '19
I had one playthrough which I called fire house. I would have a family of eight moved into a house with no doors and windows. Inside the house was eight inclosed rooms wide enough for one SIM each that was stretched into lanes. Each lane had large mirrors on the walls alternating with windows and filled with objects so the SIM would only have one spot to stand. I would then clip the family in and separate them into their own lanes and set a fire on the opposite side. As the fire got closer and closer to the SIMs, I could hear them cry for help in their fear and panic as the mirrors would reflect how useless it was and seeing their family being consumed in the flames. Eventually, there would be one survivor which I would then take out of the house and the ashes of the other SIMs would be turned into graves outside. I would then repeat the process again by moving in a new SIM family to be consumed by the fire house and leaving the survivor. After eight families have moved in and died there, I would have the survivors from each family be placed into the fire house one last time and repeat the process. Once there is just one SIM left, I got rid of the house and would play the game like normal. I would build a house to congratulate the survivor and give them the best living condition, with one exception. It would be a one story house with a mass graveyard in the back. Every night the souls of the tormented from the fire house would haunt the survivor and the SIM would always be depressed and unhappy living in the new house which is much more worse.
I missed playing the Sims.
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u/redditjwh Aug 15 '19
That's soooo messed up. I love it. I was thinking the survivor Sim would live its life in paradise. Then, I read the last couple sentences. That's brutal!
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u/ramplay Aug 15 '19
Yea, there was that one playthrough where I just tried to get every type of ghost possible
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u/shelbyCunning Aug 15 '19
When I was younger I would do this. Now I like to make them live the through the pain. Death is the easy way out.
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Aug 15 '19
I've honestly never done this. I started to feel like I was really missing out but then rembered I didn't play until college so maybe that's why? If I were younger I'd have definitely done it, especially in my Jr-high-girl-sociopath years.
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u/Naturesocks Aug 15 '19
Whoever does not kill their characters in Sims Games isnt human. Thats like driving normal in GTA. Everybody did it sometimes
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u/c0ncept Aug 15 '19 edited Aug 15 '19
On my first date with my girlfriend (now wife), we were doing the usual thing where we spoke about our interests. Video games came up, and I learned she had never been particularly interested in them. So, of course, naturally, my brain decided it would be a great opportunity to tell her about the morbid things I did in the Sims as a kid - specifically deleting the pool ladder to watch them swim to death, deleting the front door and telephone while the house burned down due to strategically placed wooden chairs near the fireplace, and how my Sim family couldn’t afford to have the child they irresponsibly had so I locked it in a 1x1 fenced in area in the back yard until it was no longer a financial strain on them. After that date, I was furious with myself because I just knew I came across like a psychopath. Somehow she still married me. Idk what the moral of this story is. I would definitely not recommend doing what I did even though it all worked out for me.
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u/atlutdfan2017 Aug 15 '19
I think the moral of the story is you married a psychopath that was clearly attracted to all the messed up stuff you did to the sims. If I were you I’d get out while I still can.
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u/skyrimisagood Aug 15 '19
It's not deleting the ladder that makes her evil it's playing video games
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Aug 15 '19
The "video games cause violence" meme is taken on a good run over in /r/thesims because there are basically two types of players: 1) those who create a cult of children that paint pictures of their dear leader all day in the basement until they die and 2) those who like to make nice buildings and give their families a happy life.
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u/derkum_66 Aug 15 '19
My mom loved the sims. One day while playing she took a short break, I quickly ran to the computer and by using a cheat code I dropped 100 pigs into her house. Then I sped up time for a minute or two. When she came back her house was a literal pig sty. I paused the game and left the room before she came back but everyone in the house could hear her scream when she saw all those damn pigs.
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Aug 15 '19
How did she deal with those 30-50 wild hogs?
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u/derkum_66 Aug 15 '19
Just like anybody else would, with an assault rifle. Just kidding. I let her panick for a bit before reloading her saved game. I saved it before I messed around on her.
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Aug 15 '19
I used to hide gnomes in unusual spots in my sister's houses. It often took her weeks to find them. I think my masterpiece was putting one on a single floor tile that I added to the top of the house like a weathervane.
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Aug 15 '19
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u/derkum_66 Aug 15 '19
I'll have to go back and look, it was by using cheat codes. So I don't know if it was part of an expansion or not, I'd assume it must have been though.
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u/OraDr8 Aug 15 '19
There are some amazing cheat codes and Sims 1 and 2 had so much user created content and mods online it was awesome.
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Aug 15 '19
I'll be on roller coaster tycoon deleting the tracks off the tops of jumps lol
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u/PropolisBeads Aug 15 '19
I used to delete the boardwalks above the water. Long build up and short climax but lol. Especially if I had a few dozen costumed guys in there.
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u/MythOfLight Aug 16 '19
Is /r/all broken again? All the posts have been up in the same order all day
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u/JohnWickMneMonic Aug 15 '19
Locking in the babies and seeing magical child protection services walk through a concrete wall.
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Aug 15 '19
If this isn't a bot-upvoted post, then I don't know what is.
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u/MessyRoom Aug 16 '19
I wonder what would happen if EVERYONE JUST MASSIVELY DOWNVOTED THIS POST NOW
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u/My_usr_Name_cusyeh Aug 15 '19
This looks like the type of shit Jim Pickens and Kevin would do.
In fact does
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u/sunfaller Aug 16 '19
I am surprised 141k people on reddit played the sims way back enough to remember this.
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u/CarefreeInMyRV Aug 15 '19 edited Aug 15 '19
Additional panels:
: she kills people in the Sims!
Everybody looks sideways at one another
Crickets chirp.
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Aug 15 '19
Man the only person that doesn't not kill anyone in the Sims, is the person who not played the sims
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u/kaptingavrin Aug 15 '19
Ah, the classic pool trick. I mean, now you have to fence them in with a nice glass fence that lets you watch them suffer, but hey, it still works. Notably the only way to kill a kid other than fire, since starving them in the basement will just get them teleported away by CPS, but fire does also work reasonably well. Oh, wait, also pufferfish.
Let's see, I've...
Killed the entire population in the game with the exception of Elsa Bjergsen who got taken by CPS (and will live a life of serious PTSD) and put their graves in a big graveyard.
Got sick of the game having no penalties for cheating on your spouse so had a Sim's wife throw a party to burn him and as many of his illegitimate kids as possible.
Have had "pufferfish parties." Aw, sorry my Sim's cooking skill sucks, guess you'll die now. (Toddlers are smart enough not to eat it.)
Got Sims rich by moving into bigger homes or moving in with lottery winners and then helping them to an "accident."
Created a clone of a Sim just to feed the clone to a cowplant and milk the essence which could then be cloned endlessly to make the scientist Sim effectively immortal.
Locked a kid inside a wall until CPS took him because the little snot kept breaking my Sim's daughter's dollhouse and making her cry.
Abused other Sims so many other ways.
But I think the top one is:
Tried to get a kid to have negative traits from the Parenthood Game Pack. I made a jerk Sim, had him get a woman pregnant, moved in with her. He'd ignore the kid unless he was being mean to her, and I left her autonomous. The guy ended up flirting with a friend, wife found out so he locked her in a room to watch her die (and seemed way too happy about it). Mom's ghost asks daughter to meet her somewhere, it's the public pool. They dance and cuddle and have a nice time. But the dad's part of Renegades and they have a meeting there. He shows up, sees she made a mess on the ground with flour and syrup, goes to find her to yell at her, but spots her just in time to see her floating face down in the pool. In pure technical terms, it seems it tried to have her swim despite low Energy (as Sims on autonomy tend to just nap and not sleep). But I swear it felt like she was happier with her mother and killed herself to be away from her dad and back with her mom.
That time I actually turned the game off for a couple of weeks. I didn't intend for it to go there. Since then even my Evil or Mean parents are nice to their kids.
The one thing I haven't tried to do yet is kill the Grim Reaper, but you know, there's a chance that may happen yet, because in strange eons, even Death may die.
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u/afxtal Aug 15 '19
My sister and I played the Sims when we were kids. We each had our own family on our own save file that we controlled.
At some point I figured out that I could invite my sister's Sims over to my house and what happened to them at my house persisted into her save file. I think you know what happened next.
I killed them. One at a time and waited for her reaction after she realized they were dead. One by one I invited them over and employed a different method each time to take them out.
Eventually her save file didn't even work anymore because it had no Sims in it.
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u/I_might_tell_a_lie Aug 15 '19
I was here last night when this was new, and now it's top of all time.
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u/BleachedJam Aug 15 '19
When I was a kid I'd always make a clone of one person in the family for the sole purpose of killing them. That way I could kill them and not mess up the family.
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u/DatWilleXD Aug 16 '19
Why does this have 150k upvotes? Its not bad by any means but is it really 150k good?
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u/TheD0mePatrol Aug 15 '19
Did anyone else think that was Ron, Harry, and Hermione at first glance or was that just me...
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u/esorayrusprime Aug 16 '19
I once started a game of the sims with two sims but, my mom called me downstairs so I paused the game. when I came back up, the game had started up again one of my sims had died apparently due to electrocution according to his ghost. to this day I don't know what happened, as nothing was broken or shorting out.
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u/AlexandersWonder Aug 16 '19
Does anyone remember blocking the ladder in Habbo Hotel to close the pool?
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u/Masterofplapp Aug 15 '19
So many shit comics upvoted to death
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u/pWheff Aug 15 '19
This has been #1 on all for like 10 hours. I mean it's not terrible, but Jesus christ
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Aug 15 '19
This can become a meme format, especially to criticise certain video games in general (Fortnite bad, am I right?)
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u/Pkock Aug 15 '19
Or shunned behaviors in other games, like one where it's a Hunter rolling need on Hand of Justice.
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Aug 15 '19
Suspicions of vote manipulation aside, this reminds me so so much of Call me Kevin and RTGame, in addition to your run of the mill sims player.
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u/Dr_OktoberfestYT Aug 15 '19
Top of all time, leading by approx. 32k upvotes
I am not a bot and this action was performed manually
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u/ChristopherWalknADog Aug 16 '19 edited Aug 16 '19
How awful is Reddit’s sense of humour Jesus edit ohh its because they drowned Sorry for my misjudgement
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u/cheesehuahuas Aug 15 '19
Remember, if you are cruel to your Sims, you are no better than the people in Westworld.
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u/lardmunch Aug 15 '19
I seriously thought this was Harry Potter and Ron trying to sabotage Hermione... Man I'm tired
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u/Atlantis536 Aug 15 '19
I like how the character actually uses the mouse. (Other visual media has characters with their hands on their keyboards even when there's obvious mouse movement on the screen.)
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u/Potatotheooflord Aug 15 '19
Real question is why are there two plumbobs above the sims heads? I never played the first one but I could've sworn that theres only a plumbob above the sim your controlling
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u/Marshmallow413 Aug 15 '19
I really wanted an authentic cemetary so I would make 8 Sim families of different ages and then kill them off in various ways to collect their urns and turn them into tombstones for the yard.
After I made an old man who moved in to watch over and take care of it, but he ended up dying of a heart attack when one of the ghosts popped up in his room and scared him.
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u/Seppons Aug 15 '19
Hey Beck, Is there a website for your comics? It's better to look at them on a website, then reddit for me.
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u/HonestVisual Aug 15 '19
Pool closed due to aids
What?! My aids told me to close the pool for repairs
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u/April_Xo Aug 15 '19
I'm currently trying to trap my nemisis in my backyard isolation chamber.. I think she's onto my plans because she won't come over..
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u/JtheUnicorn Aug 15 '19
What does this mean?
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Aug 15 '19
Removing the ladder will make sims drown in the pool, showing her insidious, dark intentions to murder virtual people.
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Aug 15 '19
I for some reason cant help but read the first panel as "your opponent is dominating people! Love her!"
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u/idiosyncratic190 Aug 15 '19
I would always create a sim couple and eventually they would have a baby. The baby would always turn into an ugly annoying kid with personality traits I didn’t like so I would purposely starve the kid so the social worker would take them away and they wouldn’t have to be in my family anymore.
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u/beckscomics Aug 15 '19 edited Aug 16 '19
If these Sims could talk, am I right? Sul sul? Huree, shoo flee! To see what other crimes against Simanity I've committed, check out more comics here.
EDIT: I'm just as confused as everyone else! I really don't know how this comic stayed at the top for so long, it's not even that good. I didn't use any manipulation or bots. If I had that kind of money, I would not spend it on bots! Thank you for reading and I'm sorry you had to look at this comic all day!