How come in boot camp like a few days before swim qual, they don't just ask for recruits who don't know how to swim, and instead of doing nothing for hours, they just go over a few days early and have some MCWIS or whoever calmly teach them at whatever speeds.
Cause yeah yeah, we're amphibious, okay motherfucker but when was the last amphibious assault?Like the '70s, and none of them were random POGs with a contract desk job. And if we went to WW3 or something, then I think they could squeeze in time to give you an hour or 2 in a pool beforehand assuming flotation devices cease to exist.
Some recruit might lie, and pretend they don't know how so they can swirl around the water of the pool instead of a clothes dryer for a few hours, but who cares.
Like if this was a special forces indoc of course they should show up with the required skills. But in the case that the Marine Corps is genuinely trying to spit out the highest numbered of qualified new Marines, why not? Some people have just never done that shit before.
Like one drill instructor took us out and made us repeat 'Evil Echo Empire' to a brick wall for 30 minutes with the threat of being dropped, as if that sounder lamer than our Buttfuck Bravo but anyway, it only took me like 7 minutes of half drowning to figure it out at swim qual. Like I coulda ran there and back in less time and saved the experience of being slowly reeled in on the little flotation ring while dudes gathered and screamed at me.
And I was like what did I do wrong, and they kindly explained apparently you weren't supposed to grab onto the guy saving you from drowning, and attempt to hoist yourself up by pogo-ing off his shoulders and I honestly don't even remember doing that, but like hey I've never been dunked into the water like that and I wasn't ready take one. I guess I learned something that day though. I learned I woulda drowned that man for my sake, with 10 witnesses, but I didn't--he won the fight, so I'm not even sorry.
I climbed out with giant soggy clown boots on and was told to do it again, eventually barely making it on the third time, but also almost drowning trying to get back to the side to eek out the win since the other events are freebies.
I was told, "A Marine never lies.." and they promised they weren't going to push me, but they just did though. I wasn't freezing up or anything, I was just following orders, look up, look down, cross chest, and he immediately shoved me off the plank like it was personal.
I'm sorry I'm a man who lived on land and breathes air who has the wherewithal to avoid completely submerging himself in deep water just like if I lived right by space I wouldn't poke my head up there for fun.
But to further my argument I think it's genuinely racist. It was honestly just me and 5 black kids getting pushed into a pool until we could swim out of it, and I learned first, who knows what else coulda gone down there afterwards.
Excuse me sir can i just walk over there and stand with the other guys who don't know how to swim, and he's like what do mean you don't know how to blow up your pants like a balloon and tie them round your neck while treading water? what state are you from? you know were amphibians right?