A bright light illuminated my workshop suddenly, causing me to drop my tools on the table. A figure appeared at the opposite side of the small office, encased within a surreal shadow in the middle of the blinding light. Slowly the light faded, as I made out the visitor. I was looking at myself.

"Wh-what are you- what am I...?" I stumbled, unsure if I could even blink anymore.

"I'm you from the future," the other me said. He appeared slightly older than I remembered from my mirror that morning.

"So it works?" I asked, wondering how else I would be there.

"Yes, it works," he answered, obviously wondering why I would ask such a thing.

"But why are you here?" I asked, just noticing I wasn't as happy as one would expect from meeting themselves. Not me, I was dazed but ecstatic. The other me seemed like he had been crying. "Are you ok?" I asked myself.

His eyes widened, but then quickly relaxed. "It's fine, but I just came to the wrong time."

"You didn't mean to meet me here?"

"No, this is too late." His voice became cold. "My work can still be recovered if I do it here."

"Do what here?" I asked, not sure I wanted to know the answer.

The other me stared, as he pulled out a handheld device, much smaller than my phone. After pressing some buttons on the screen, the bright light returned, enveloping him again until he quickly disappeared from the room. I'm not sure why, but I ran into the area of his departure before the light faded. I panicked when I realized I didn’t know where or when I was going, but my thoughts were interrupted when the light faded and everything went black.

I came to what seemed like hours later to find myself in my office, but I wasn't alone. The other me- or some other other me was lying on the ground by the table, gasping for air.

"What happened?" I asked running to my counterpart’s side frantically. "Did... I do this to you?"

"It's all wrong," he said, clutching his chest. Blood trailed around him, seeping through his closed fist. "None of this makes sense."

Before I could speak again, I noticed something odd. He didn't look younger than me. He was older. "You're the me that I just met, aren't you?"

"Yes," he started, spitting up some blood. "I pulled out my knife, but he grabbed it out of my hand and stabbed me before I could get to him."

"But why?" I yelled, desperate to understand why I would attempt to kill myself.

"You try to fix one thing," he trailed off, his eyes losing focus. He became still and my mind turned into override.

I had watched myself die. I ended up going back in time to kill myself, but my past self killed me instead. That was my future. Why would I do that? Was I still going to do it, knowing what I knew? If I didn’t, how was I in still in the past?

"Don't even try it," a voice called behind me. "I don't know why you guys came back, but I'm not letting you kill me."

I turned around to see a younger version of myself standing in the doorway, wielding a bloody knife in one hand and the handheld device in the other. Before I could respond, he pushed a button and light filled the room once again. A few moments later, I was alone.

It was a time before I had even started working on time travel. My only way back disappeared with my past self, which didn’t even seem to make sense. How could he become me if he wasn’t even there anymore? Would I become me? My head hurt.

“Hello,” another voice called into the room. It was female, so I immediately knew it wasn’t me again. I turned toward the door to find the solution to one of my lingering questions.

“Gwen,” I answered, walking toward her with my hand extended. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“How did you know my name?” she asked, shaking my hand with a confused look on her face.

Smooth move. I didn’t know her name the first time this happened. But at least it revealed the date. This was the day I met the best and worst thing that ever happened to me. “I saw your name on the sign-in sheet,” I answered. “You must be the new girl. I’m Chris. Chris Michael.”

I began to lead her into my office. “Let me show you around. This is my off-”

What was I doing? There was a dead body on the floor by my worktable. Not just any dead body, my dead body.

“On second thought, my office is a mess,” I sputtered. I turned Gwen toward the hall. “Why don’t you head over to the break room around the corner and I’ll buy you a cup of coffee? Just give me a few minutes.”

“Sure,” she smiled. She began walking away, but stopped momentarily and shot me a wink. “You’re an interesting guy, Chris.”

As Gwen walked down the hall, I darted back into the room. My future death was still where I left it. Police weren’t an option, what would I tell them? An older version of me was killed by a younger version of me? The only option was to dispose of the evidence. Trying to think back to old gangster movies, I heard footsteps by the door.

“Uh, don’t come in here!” I yelled. “There’s a, uh-” I couldn’t believe my eyes. Two men stood in the doorway. I was looking at two identical versions of myself.

“Hey, Chris,” the one on the left said. “Sorry about earlier. I didn’t know you weren’t here to kill me too.”

“So you’re the me from this time, right?” I asked Lefty. “Who is this then?”

“Hi Chris,” the one on the right said. “I’m him, but after he stopped me from saving our future self there“

“But you didn’t-” I turned to the left. “You killed him.”

“I did,” said Lefty. “Pay attention, because this will get even more complicated. After killing future us, I had to know why he came back, so I went to the future. You know what I found? Future you. Stranded, you had taken my place, fell in love with Gwen, and never invented time travel.”

My head hurt again.

“There was no way to know what happened,” interjected Righty, “because time was overwritten. So the original timeline had to be restored.”

“How?” I asked no one in particular.

“I went back to before our future self met me.” I’m not sure who said that, I was too busy clutching my head. “I took care of him and then sent you back to your proper time before you woke up. Everything continued normally and I followed the timeline to figure out what originally happened.”

“Oh, I can’t wait to hear this part,” I said.

“It’s all about Gwen,” said Lefty. “As you know, she eventually broke up with you because you were too dedicated to your work. Apparently you fixed that mistake when you had another chance back here.”

“Gwen,” I whispered. “She’s waiting for me in the break room.”

“We know,” said Righty.

“So where did you come from then?” I asked Righty.

“I had to undo what I did,” answered Lefty. “With you back in your time, you finish inventing time travel, but things don’t end well with Gwen.”

“I already know that,” I sighed. “She broke up with me before. This is old news to me.”

“But,” started Lefty, “with the addition of time travel, you become obsessed with fixing things. It gets a little more complicated here. You basically go back in time and try to make it work with her over and over, but it never ends well. Eventually, you decide you have to go back to the beginning and… start all over.”

“By killing you and taking your place?”

“Exactly. My place.”

“Oh,” I said.

“Yeah,” said Lefty, who was giving me an unnerving stare.

“What about me?” I asked “And Righty?”

“Righty…? Oh, because I’m standing on your right. He wants us to leave.”

“You two take the time machine,” said Lefty. “Go live with the dinosaurs for all I care, just stay away.”

Righty patted me on the back and raised his eyebrows in an approving nod. Lefty handed him the handheld device, which looked different. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but there seemed to be more buttons or something. Righty pushed one of them, but something was wrong. The expected light was there, but it was red. As Righty began to fade, a screeching sound emanated from the epicenter as he let out a horrendous scream.

“What did you do?” I yelled jumping into the hallway where Lefty had previously moved. His eyes widened as he pulled a familiar knife from his pocket.

“I can’t have you coming back and messing with my life!” he shrieked, swinging the knife in my direction. “I’ve already killed two of you, there’s no way you’re getting away!”

I jumped back into the room as the red light cleared, leaving behind a charred mark on the floor. Lefty followed me, still swinging. “Hey, what’s that?” I yelled, pointing behind him. He turned his head to find nothing, but before he could turn back, my fist met his chin. After pulling the knife from his hand I quickly buried it into his chest. As he fell to the ground, I could hear footsteps coming down the hall.

“Chris?” Gwen called.

I ran out of the room and slammed the door behind me to find Gwen holding two cups of coffee. “Hi, Gwen,” I said hysterically. She gave an odd look but then laughed, handing me one of the cups.

“I figured since you were so busy, I’d buy you the coffee this time. Would you like show me your office now?”

I looked at my closed door and then back at Gwen. “No, I still have some more cleaning to do. I have a new research project I need to prepare. But for now, how about we go enjoy these coffees in the break room?”

Part I | Part II

Rainfall washed over Doc’s mansion. Inside, everyone was asleep. A young Doc Brown was laid out on the couch, his dog Copernicus lying on the floor next to him. Across from him, Marty and Jennifer were curled up together on a chair, using another chair to prop up their legs. Static glowed from the television, shining over everyone in the room.

“Hey, kids, what time is it?” a voice shouted from the TV as the static faded into a puppet face.

“Howdy Doody Time!” a group of kids answered in unison.

Doc’s head shot up from the couch. “Great Scott!” He stood up in a daze and put on his jacket, which was previously serving as his blanket. Making out the sound from the TV, he turned back and looked at the program. “Howdy Doody Time?” He looked at his watch, turned off the TV, and proceeded to a desk, where he activated a recording device.

“Date, Sunday, November thirteenth, nineteen fifty-five, seven oh-one AM. Last night's time travel experiment was apparently a complete success.”

As Doc continued, Marty started waking up. He gently moved Jennifer aside, so he could get up, and looked in Doc’s direction to find him pacing around while he recorded the events of the night before.

“I don’t even remember how I got home!” yelled Doc into his recording device.

Jennifer woke up and smiled at Marty.

“…Caused a disruption of my own brain waves resulting in a condition of temporary amnesia. Indeed I now recall the moments after the time vehicle disappeared... into the future... I saw a vision of myself in the time machine, perhaps myself that had come back from the future?”

“Doc?” asked Marty, now standing behind him.

“Undoubtedly this was some sort of-“ Doc’s thought was interrupted by the realization that Marty, who he believed he just sent back to the future, was standing right in front of him. “AHHH! AHH! AHH!”

“Huh,” Marty laughed. “Just like in the movie.”

“You can’t be here! I sent you back to the future!” Doc ran into the bathroom and slammed the door. “It doesn’t make sense for you to be here!”

“I am here and it does make sense!” shouted Marty through the door. “I came back to 1955 with you and my girlfriend, Jennifer, because we were trapped in another world where our lives were just a movie! You, the you from 1985, figured out we could only get home if we came back here to 1955!”

“1955!” yelled Doc, opening the bathroom door. “That’s a very interesting story-“

“Future boy,” interrupted Marty.

Doc raised his eyebrows, but continued. “But, if the me of the future came back with you to your past, where is he right now?”

Marty pointed behind Doc into the bathroom. Following his finger, Doc turned around to find another Doc sitting up in the bathtub.

“Great Scott,” the two Docs said in unison.

“We need to talk, uh, me,” said future Doc.

“Wait a minute, Doc,” started Marty. “Docs,” he corrected after a pause. “Should the two of you be talking? Couldn’t this cause one of those major paradoxes?”

“A major paradox?” asked young Doc. “Like when Marty almost stopped himself from being born?”

“Precisely,” said future Doc. “And while the possibility certainly exists, I don’t think we’re in any trouble. After watching the movies of our lives, my younger counterpart here has learned so much about his future and still managed to keep the future intact.“ Everyone looked at young Doc, who had a smile of accomplishment. “Besides, we’re going to need his help to get home.”

“Is this a matter of plutonium again?” asked young Doc. “If so, unless you know when lightning will strike again, I’m afraid you’re all stuck here!”

“No,” answered future Doc. “Fuel is not the problem. While we were able to successfully jump back into our own world, the process of multidimensional travel had an unfortunate side effect on the DeLorean. It has been rendered unable to handle the flux dispersal necessary for time travel.”

“And there aren’t any DeLoreans here in 1955,” said Marty. “So what do we do?”

“That’s why we’re here,” said future Doc, now facing young Doc. “I’m sure between the two of us, we can find a solution.”

“I guess two Docs are better than one,” said Jennifer.

Young Doc turned to Jennifer. “I’m sorry, with all the excitement, I didn’t even notice you there. You’re Marty’s girlfriend, right?”

“The one and only,” said Jennifer, putting her arm around her boyfriend’s shoulders.

“He was right. That is, he told me you were pretty. It’s nice to meet you.”

Later that evening, the two Docs were hard at work while Marty and Jennifer sat on the couch with Copernicus watching Lassie.

“That just might work!” yelled one of the Docs, prompting the three on the couch to turn their heads around.

“Did you guys figure it out?” asked Marty.

“I believe so, Marty,” answered young Doc.

“Everyone gather around,” said future Doc. He walked over to a model of downtown Hill Valley and picked up a charred car as everyone crowded around the table. “This is the DeLorean,” he said. “Normally, 1.21 jiggawatts of electricity are generated and focused into the flux capacitor, which then disperses its temporal energy into a vortex. This vortex is what facilitates the journey through time.”

“Right, Doc,” said Marty.

“Your unexpected jump between worlds caused a reaction in the time vehicle,” said young Doc. “This reaction interrupts the dispersal, making time travel impossible.”

“So how do we fix it this time without a new DeLorean?” asked Jennifer.

“Simple,” said future Doc. “We just need to overload the flux capacitor.”

“2.42 jiggawatts!” yelled young Doc. “By doubling the amount of power, it should more than cover the loss of flux dispersal in the current state of the vehicle.”

“Sounds good, Docs,” said Marty. “When do we leave?”

“We can leave right now,” said future Doc. “Except…”

“Except what?”

“Except, there is a slight possibility the overload could cause… problems. Which is why I’ll be making the trip myself.”

“Yourself, Doc? What about me and Jennifer?”

“When the trip is successful, I will return a moment later. You won’t even have to wait.”

“I don’t like it, Doc.” Marty picked up the car keys from the table. “I’ll go.”

“You could go, Marty, except for one thing.” Doc pointed at the wall behind him. As Marty turned around, Doc grabbed the keys from him hands and bolted to the door.

“I’ll be right back!” he yelled as he pulled the door open and ran outside.

“Doc, no!” yelled Marty after he reached the door. “I can’t believe I fell for that.”

Jennifer and young Doc arrived at the door and the three of them watched as Doc sped away in the DeLorean, eventually disappearing in a flash of light.

“Doc,” said Marty, turning to face young Doc. “When you said a ‘slight possibility of problems’, what did that mean?”

“Well, we foresee two possibilities,” answered Doc. “One, the time vehicle simply arrives at the desired destination in 1985. Or two, the overload in the flux capacitor causes a chain reaction in the flux dispersal that-”

“Destroys the entire universe?” interrupted Marty.

“What? No. It sends the time vehicle to another time entirely.”

“When?”

“There’s no way to know for sure, but-”

“Wait a minute, Doc,” interrupted Marty again, in a panic. “Where are you? I mean future you. Why aren’t you back yet?”

“Calm down, Marty, I’m sure I’m fine. I’ll probably be back any minute.“ As soon as Doc finished his sentence, three loud booms erupted into another flash of light, this time originating from the sky. Doc, Marty, and Jennifer looked up to see the DeLorean flying through the air and then lower itself onto the road in front of them.

“Doc!” yelled Marty, as he and the others ran to greet him. He reached the passenger side of the car to find a familiar face. Next to Doc was his dog, Einstein, standing up in the passenger seat and wagging his tail. Marty opened the gullwing door and started petting him. “Einstein! Long time no see!” He then turned his attention to the driver’s seat. “Doc, glad you could make it back. I see you decided to stop off in the future?”

“Not intentionally,” said future Doc. “It turned out that the 2.42 jiggawatts caused the input destination time to increment from thirty years to sixty.”

“You mean it brought you to 2015?”

“Precisely. I figured, while I was there I might as well pick up Einie and install a hover conversion.”

Einstein jumped out of the car as Copernicus ran out of the house to meet him. The two dogs began sniffing each other.

“So how did you get back?” asked Marty.

“Simple,” answered future Doc. “I recalibrated the time circuits to account for the extra energy.”

“Remarkable,” said young Doc. “The car can actually fly.”

“Well everyone,” said future Doc. “I believe it’s time we got going. I know you all must be longing to get home.”

“I guess this is goodbye,” said young Doc. “Marty,” he said, putting his hand on his friend’s shoulder. “It was good to see you again, but I’m pretty sure we said ‘thirty years.’”

“Right, Doc,” said Marty. “Thirty years for you, but literally no time for me.”

Young Doc walked over to future Doc. “I guess we’ll meet again in thirty years too.”

“You’re already here,” said future Doc, pointing to his head.

Young Doc watched as Marty, Jennifer, future Doc, and Einstein crammed into the DeLorean, which then lifted off the ground and flew away into the sky where it vanished.

Doc landed the DeLorean outside Marty’s house where he had picked up him and Jennifer earlier that day.

“It’s dark, but not too late,” said Marty to Jennifer as they got out of the car. “We can still go to the lake.”

“That would be great, Marty,” she said.

Marty noticed Doc typing in a new destination in the time circuits. “Hey, Doc, where you headed now?” He chuckled. “Back to the future?”

“Nope,” said Doc, as the DeLorean lifted up into the air again. “I’m going in the opposite direction. There’s a woman named Clara waiting for me in 1885.”

The DeLorean shot into the air and zoomed forward until it was gone.

THE END

[WP] You are an alien researcher and who have been instructed to not respond to any transmissions from Earth, as they are not 'ready' yet, however, Earth keeps sending transmissions.

Is there anybody out there? Please respond. We are from Earth.

Is there anybody out there? Please respond. We are from Earth.

Is there anybody out there? Please respond. We are from Earth.

We are out here, but we can't talk yet. Please stop sending these messages. I can't sleep!

Who are you? Are you from another world? We are from Earth.

I know where you're from, Earthlings. I know everything about your primitive planet. Please STOP responding.

Please send us your coordinates. Where do we look in our sky to find you?

I'm not even supposed to be communicating with you.

There is much we can learn from each other. What is your name? What do your people look like? What are your greatest advances in technology?

Can you not read? I'm responding in your own language. I SHOULD NOT EVEN BE DOING THAT. Forget I responded at all and stop replying.

We will try again in a few hours. Have a good night :)

[WP] Your roommate is literally the Devil. Surprisingly, he is the best roommate you ever had.

The last thing I remembered seeing were headlights and everything went black. When I woke up, everything was hot. It wasn't too bad, more like a dry heat. As my vision returned, all I could see were flames burning in every direction. It felt like a nightmare, but after you wake up and realize you were dreaming.

"Hey, bud," a voice called from one of the flames. A tall figure emerged, sporting jeans, a white t-shirt, and red skin. "Welcome to Hell," he said cheerfully.

"H-hell?" I asked with a stutter.

"Yeah, bud," the red guy said, patting me on the shoulder. "Sorry to have to tell you, but you died."

"I'm dead?" I asked.

"Yep," he answered, looking at his watch.

"And I'm in Hell... Are you the Devil?"

"Yeah, pretty neat, huh?" the Devil answered with a smile. "Listen," he continued, leading me toward one of the larger flames. "Hell has gotten a bit crowded and we're making a little more room- you'd think there'd be more contractors down here- but for now we're having everyone share a space."

"I have to have a roommate in Hell?" I asked.

"Yeah, but guess what?" the Devil shouted as we reached the flame. "You're going to be my roommate. How cool is that?"

"Pretty cool, I guess." I pulled back as the Devil started leading us into the flame.

"It's ok," he said pulling me into it.

We were suddenly inside a large room, filled with furniture and several big screen TVs mounted in mid air.

"You want some pizza, dude?" the Devil asked as he dropped down to one of the couches and clapped his hands. Two large pizzas appeared on the coffee table in front of him as the TV turned on and started playing Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.

I dropped down on the couch next to him, grabbed a slice, and chowed down.

"Hey!" the Devil yelled. "Use a plate, you animal."

My goal for 2016 is to write a writing prompt response every day. I figured it was a throwaway resolution, but whaddya know, I went five days (and counting) in a row. Maybe I can accomplish this one.

*Update: 88 days in a row.

March

February

January

Welcome to /r/MajorParadox! This is where I post my stories for you to read. Yes, you!

Please let me know what you think! I can only improve as a writer if I know what I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong (me, wrong? Pfft).

If you like what you see, how about subscribing?

Not sure where to start? Here are some categories:

Recommended Stories

Continued Stories

Book Progress

Full Story Index

Any questions? Feedback on old, archived stories? Just want to say hi? Comment below!

Welcome to /r/MajorParadox! This is where I post my stories for you to read. Yes, you!

Please let me know what you think! I can only improve as a writer if I know what I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong (me, wrong? Pfft).

If you like what you see, how about subscribing?

Not sure where to start? Here are some categories:

Recommended Stories

Continued Stories

Book Progress

Full Story Index

Any questions? Feedback on old, archived stories? Just want to say hi? Comment below!

Write a story from the perspective of a cat that was bought as a Christmas present.

What's that noise? Some kind of jingling? Oh. The cage door in front of me is opening. At last I can escape this prison. I peak my head out and realize I have no idea where I am. Maybe I should stay in here.

I peak my head out again when I notice a couch not too far away. In an instant, I'm underneath the couch. Still confining, but confined under my own terms. A head peaks under the couch and I retreat in deeper.

"Blah blah blah, kitty," the head says. "Blah blah blah food in the kitchen."

I scan the area and see an opening to another room. Two bowls are visible. That must be the food the head was talking about. After it pulls away, I find the head has grown into a full-on giant. I wait until it leaves. Better wait a bit longer, just to be sure it won't come back.

I dart toward the bowls as quickly as I did the couch. The big head wasn't lying. One bowl is filled with an abundance of food, the other with crystal clear water. I nibble away and lick up some of the water to wash it down. Before I continue, my nose perks up. There's something on top of the table next to me.

In a quick motion, I leap onto the nearby chair and hop up to the table. I've hit the jackpot. A plate of cookies sits before me. I sneak up to them slowly, savoring the strong chocolatey smell. Before I make my move a hand swoops in and lifts the plate into the air.

Another giant is standing by the table holding the plate. This one is wider and redder than the previous one. He extends a hand, petting the top of my head, which feels better than I imagine the cookies would have tasted.

"Sorry, kitty," he says. "Cookies are bad for cats. Besides, these are for me anyway."

I just realized most of my stories have been archived, so you can't vote or comment on them.

Don't be sad! I made this post so you can have a place to send your comments! It's always great to hear what you liked, but I am just as open to criticism. Anything that will help me be a better writer is appreciated!

[WP] Your job is to open and close a door all day. Anything can appear on the other side. Your partner documents the results.

"Another empty room," I called.

"Empty room," answered Jones. "Got it."

I closed the door slowly. My arm had become numb. All day long I would open and close the same door. That was my job. I'd been doing it for five years. Most of the time I was met with an empty room. Every once in a while, something different would happen. Even though it wasn't much, the small change in scenery was enough to brighten my day.

One time I found a basketball on the floor. Another time I found a book. The book would have been more noteworthy if it had any words in it. On one of the best days I ever had, I found a bicycle. It wasn't against the rules to take anything we found as long as Jones documented it. On our lunch break, we took turns riding the bike outside.

"It's time," called Jones. "What's next?"

I pulled open the door and almost fell backwards. I saw myself on the other side opening an opposite-faced door in the other direction.

"Uh," I said.

"Huh," said the other me. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Yes," I answered.

The other me walked into my room and then I walked into his room.

"Well?" asked Jones' in an echo. "What did you find?"

I looked at my other self and the two of us closed the doors at the same time.

"Another empty room," I called.

"OK, /u/ScarecrowSid," said /u/you-are-lovely. "I need you to deliver this data packet to /u/SqueeWrites." She was holding a blue, glowing disk.

Sid scratched his stomach and a thin piece of straw fell out and glided to the ground. Bobbing his head casually, he leaned over to pick it up and stuff it back in.

"Did you hear what I said?" asked Lovely, holding back a glare.

"Was it about the Wizard?" asked Sid, shrugging.

Lovely pinched her temple. "No, Sid," she answered, gritting her teeth. "I told you that was a movie from a long time ago. Just because you're a super advanced scarecrow doesn't mean you're the same character."

"..."

Lovely took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Listen, Sid. Are you listening?"

Sid perked up his ears. "Yep!" he shouted.

"OK, good." Lovely looked into Sid's eyes intensely. "Bring. This. Data. Packet. To. Squee."

"Got it," said Sid nodding and taking the luminous packet from her hand. He turned around, but quickly turned back. "Squee's the Wizard right?"

Lovely cursed under her breath and fought back tears. "Yes, Sid," she said, rolling her eyes. "Squee's the Wizard."

Skipping away, Sid hummed. "We're off to see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz!"

Continued here >>

[WP] You're a superhero... but you don't rescue people from life-threatening situations or anything serious, more like embarrassing or inconvenient situations.

"Hi there," said Gus with a wink. "Sorry to interrupt, but you are too beautiful not to meet."

Leslie placed her book down next to her on the park bench. "Thanks," she said with a forced smile.

"Mind if I sit down?" asked Gus as he dropped himself over her book.

"Uh," was all Leslie could say as she cringed at her book's smushing.

"Thanks," said Gus with another wink. "Are you new in town? I've never seen you in this park before."

"I've actually lived here all my life," answered Leslie while reaching for her book, but ultimately deciding against grabbing under her suitor for it. "I come here to read everyday," she continued, pointing to where the book was under Gus.

Following her finger, Gus caressed his jeans. "Oh, you like these, huh? I got them on sale at JC Penny."

"No," said Leslie, still pointing. "You're sitting-"

"Oh, I'm sitting too far away?" asked Gus, sliding closer. He placed his arm around the confused woman. "You are quite the lady," he said.

"Remove your arm and step away from the woman," a voice called. Leslie and Gus looked around the park and couldn't find the source. "Up here," the voice added. Floating in the air was a masked gentleman wearing a blue and yellow costume; splashes of colors mixed together at random locations.

"Who are you?" asked Gus, amazed at the sight above him.

"I'm Captain Appropriate Man," the floating hero said. "I step in when people cross the line- wait, no, I'm The Line Man. Watch out for the line, man."

Gus stood up and Leslie grabbed her book as soon as it was free. "I was just talking to the girl," said Gus. "Sorry to bother you," he added, walking away in a slump.

"Thanks, Captain, uh, Line Man," said Leslie, shaking her book clean.

"No problem, ma'am," the hero answered, while descending to ground level. He hovered until he was over the park bench and dropped down next to her, placing his arm over her shoulder. "Always happy to help such a beautiful woman," he added with a wink.

[WP] Spam AI can make phone calls as family and friends trying to get you to buy something

"Hello?" answered John, putting his phone up to his ear.

"John, it's me," a voice on the other end said.

"Mom?" he asked. "Are you OK? You sound strange."

"I'm fine, son," the voice continued. "I need you to bring some Smokey Soda to dinner tonight."

"Uh, OK," said John. "Does anyone even drink that stuff?"

"Yes, son," answered the voice. "Your brothers and sisters can't get enough of that smokey flavor!"

"... OK, Mom, I'll stop by the store on the way over."

Later that night, John arrived at his mother's house, with a 2-liter bottle of Smokey Soda in hand. He heard a voice behind him. It was his sister, Carol.

"Hey, John," said Carol. "I see you brought soda too. I guess Mom asked both of us."

John turned around to find Carol also holding a 2 liter of Smokey Soda.

"Huh, that's weird" said John. The two entered to house to find their other brothers and sisters had already arrived.

"Put the soda on the table," their mom greeted them at the door. "And poor a cup. Might as well make the best out of this ad scam."

This prompt response is brought to you by Smokey Soda. "The only soda with the smokey flavor."

[WP] What happens at the end?

Jordan regained consciousness to find he was standing up and covered by white light. The ground was white, the sky was white, and nothing but whiteness went on in every direction. He also found himself all alone.

As soon as the thought entered his mind, another person appeared next to him. He was an older man, with a white beard, wearing a white shirt and pants. It was then that he realized he was also wearing similarly colored clothing, although he wasn't sure he was a moment ago.

"This is unusual, isn't it?" the bearded man asked.

"Yes, it is," answered Jordan. He looked at the older man closely. "Heaven, huh?"

"It would appear that way," he answered.

Jordan rolled his eyes at the vague response. Screw it, he thought. He didn't have to play games. "What's the meaning of life?" he asked.

"Oh, a quiz?" asked the man. "The meaning of life is to find the meaning of life. But what do you have to say about it"

"What do I have to say?" said Jordan. "I think the meaning of life is something you should tell me. And without the circular logic."

The old man furrowed his brow. "I expected you to have better manners," he stated.

Jordan threw his hands in the air. "Well, I'm sorry, but forgive me for thinking God would be more straightforward with me. I've obviously died in that car crash and I don't appreciate the mind games."

"Wait a minute," the man started. "You're not God? I'm not God either. My name is Reggie. I just died too."

The two looked into each other's eyes.

Reggie stroked his white beard. "Why isn't there anyone here to meet us?" he asked. "And where's everybody else?"

"Hi," a voice broke into the conversation. "I'm here."

Jordan and Reggie looked down to find a medium-sized yellow lab mix sitting next to them. They both nearly fell over when it spoke up.

"How long have you two been here?" the dog asked.

"We just got here," answered Jordan. "Are- are you God?"

"Close," he answered. "I'm a dog, not a god. I can see how you'd make that mistake. Name's Max."

"Nice to meet you, Max," said Reggie, petting him on the head.

Max wagged his tail and smiled.

"Well, since none of us are God," said Max. "How about we go find him? I have a pretty good nose. I'll lead the way."

Santa crashes in a forest soon after take off. Is that daylight?

Santa looked around as he regained consciousness.

"Ugh," he moaned, clutching his forehead. "I can't believe that just happened."

His surroundings were beautiful. Large trees with vibrant purples leaves spread over varying shades of green grass. The sun in the distance cut through the trees, illuminating the nature in a pleasant glow. Santa never saw colors quite like- It just occurred to him that it was daylight. He crashed in the middle of the night. Barely halfway through delivering presents.

Where were the presents? Santa looked around frantically. And where was his sleigh and the reindeer? Did he get thrown out before the crash? The more he thought, the more realized he didn't even remember the crash. He was flying through the night when suddenly everything went black and he woke up in that strange, yet beautiful place.

"Excuse me, Mr. Red," a soft voice asked behind him. He turned around to see a small, green child-like figure standing behind him. "I've never seen anyone quite like you before," she continued.

"Well, child," said Santa with his usual gregarious tone. "My name is Santa Claus. What's your name?"

"My name is Nella," she answered. "You seemed a bit upset when you woke up. Is everything OK?"

"Well, Nelly," started Santa. "I was in the middle of delivering presents when I crashed here. It's daytime now, so that means many children will be sad I didn't make it."

Nelly face dropped. "I'm so sorry Mr. Claus." She shook her head anxiously. "It's all my fault."

Santa put a hand on Nelly's shoulder. "Now, dear, why would you say it's your fault?'

Nelly was in tears. "I watched you flying by our land and I wanted to meet you, so I brought you here." She turned her head in thought. "But, wait, it's not even that bad! Yes, the sun is here, but it's always here. This land doesn't flow the same as your land. I can send you back and it will be like you never left!"

"That's great news, Nelly!" yelled Santa pumping his fists in the air in celebration. He looked back down at his new friend. "I would like to return and meet your other friends and family if that's OK."

"That would be great!" yelled Nelly. "Maybe we can even visit your land someday. We may even be able to help out. We elves are quite the builders. Is there anything we can help you build?"

Chapter 1

Written as a new first chapter in the /r/WritingPrompts contest, this will most likely end up as chapter 2 in the book.

Chapter 2: Space Command

Trent leaned back in his chair, staring at his viewport monitor on the wall in front of him. A jumble of images filled the screen, several of which were highlighted in red. With small movements from his hand, Trent moved the images around, zooming in on each one before they swiveled away from his main area of focus. A lone image in the corner suddenly began blinking and Trent quickly zoomed it into view. A slithery alien was displayed, with a message icon circling it slowly. A few motions from his hand popped open the message, which contained seemingly random accounts of possible sightings.

“Not much to go on here,” whispered Trent. There was nobody else in his small, yet lofty office. Part of him felt cramped in there, but looking up at the massive ceilings helped relieve the tension. And he had nothing but tension lately. Never before had Trent been micromanaged as he’d been in the last six months. And it wasn’t from any of his direct superiors either. It was one of the Chiefs of the Tribunal, the scariest one too. Everything he said held a weight to it that made you think he was a step away from bashing you into the ground.

It didn’t help that the Chiefs were gigantic, totems of authority, which was the only reason for the height of the ceilings. Every room at Space Command had to account for their colossal statures. Out of the three hundred and twenty-two worlds in the Space Union, the Chiefs were the only ones who required such accommodations. But, since they presided over the Chief Tribunal Panel and operated in Space Command, the oversized space station had to be designed to their standards.

Trent wasn’t in the Tribunal Panel, but he did work for them. While there were a few other responsibilities, his main task was to oversee the retrieval of individuals sought by the Tribunal. This meant that Trent commissioned contracts for bounty hunters to bring in space criminals and others of interest. Normally this was a breeze. Bounties came and went, some were never even resolved, but these high priority ones were coming from Chief Bront himself. Every day that went without bringing them in was another day Bront would pay him a visit. And each time he was just as eager for an update, never lessening any expectation of a successful resolution to the matter. What that matter was, Trent didn’t even know. It was none of his business, which is something Bront made very clear on day one.

It did bother Trent a little bit. The cases in question weren’t even from anywhere in the union. He could only wonder how they got into the system let alone how they’ve managed to remain underground for so long. But it still didn’t matter. He had a job to do and he wasn’t going to fail Bront. Part of him knew Bront would never harm him-he was a Chief after all-but it was hard not to picture him flipping out and pummeling him into a pulp, hence the tension. All he had to do was get this businesses taken care of as quickly as possible and he would be able to go back to normal, tension-free days in his small, sometimes cozy office with the high ceilings.

Suddenly the entire room shook. Trent barely reacted anymore; he was used to it. The first time Bront came to him, he nearly had a panic attack. Each step by the mammoth Chief trembled all the rooms in his vicinity. While it didn’t necessarily indicate anything, one couldn’t help but assume there was anger in each step. At least that’s what Trent assumed in those first few months. As time went on-while he couldn’t dismiss Bront’s rage on the situation-Trent wasn’t as scared to deliver bad news as he had been. In fact, he was happy he was there so he could get it over with and not have to see him again until the next day.

Before Bront could even reach the door, Trent was already there tapping it open.

“Trent,” said Bront, with a voice just as menacing as one would expect. “Why hasn’t the Earth situation been handled yet?”

“Working on it, sir,” answered Trent calmly, as he looked up to his superior. “There just haven’t been any confirmed reported sightings or incidents.”

Bront exhaled brashly in a disapproving manner. It didn’t matter how many times Trent explained it, he was never satisfied with any excuses. The issue had to be resolved.

“The Tribunal Panel is meeting,” he said. “If anything changes, you come get me right away.”

Trent nodded.

Bront left through the large doors and marched down the long hallway, his quaking steps fading the farther away he got. Trent waited until he was out of view to tap the door closed and he promptly returned to his chair.

Trent’s eyes lit up when he saw a message icon circling one of the red images on his screen.

“Please let there be a sighting… please let there be a sighting… please let there be a sighting.” Trent moved his hand around, bringing the image into view and popping up the notification. It was a message from a bartender in a space station rest stop. The Earthling was there and an altercation had taken place. Video surveillance was to follow.

Trent jumped up, with his eyes widened as far as they’d ever been. This was it. This was what Bront wanted to hear every day he came to check on the progress. It wasn’t a resolution yet, but it did open the possibility for progress. If he ran, he could probably catch Bront before he got to the meeting. Even though he was told to interrupt, Trent did not want to do that. Disrupting a Tribunal Panel meeting was a serious crime. Sure, he had permission, but that wouldn’t stop everyone from assuming the worst about it.

“Where’s Chief Bront?” asked Trent upon reaching the entrance to the Tribunal room. An outside straggler shrugged.

“He’s already in there,” said another, as he walked into the room.

“Dammit,” yelled Trent under his breath. “Um, does anyone want to send him a message for me?”

Everybody outside the room just stared.

“I guess not,” whispered Trent. He inched his way toward the door and took a deep breath. “Better to get this over with than deal with the consequences later.” He opened the door to the enormous conference room, filled with circular tables ascending upwards toward the back. The five corners of the backmost table were reserved for the Chiefs. In the center was a giant 360-monitor screen, which was used for displaying focused communication on whomever was speaking during the meeting.

Members of the Panel, representing all the worlds of the Space Union, were walking to their seats. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad. Nobody would notice his intrusion since they were occupied on getting set up. Trent sprinted as casually as he could toward Bront’s corner on the other side of the room.

Trent cleared his throat upon reaching Bront’s area. “Excuse me, Chief,” he said. “Something’s come up. You should probably see it.”

Bront’s eyes widened and he let out a smile that Trent had never seen before. Not from him, at least. The other Chiefs were known for their happy-go-lucky demeanors, despite looking like giant behemoths just the same. Bront was the oddity: always grumpy, never happy. Trent wasn’t sure which one was scarier.

“Hmm, I can’t leave now,” said Bront, ponderingly. “The meeting is about to start soon.”

Trent wondered why he was ordered to get him if he couldn’t even leave. “It’s OK, I can login from here,” he said. He leaned down to the curved desk, which circled around the entire room, even though all the space between Bront and the other Chiefs were empty. The lower tables held more people at each level. A double-tap on the surface illuminated a screen, where several hand motions brought up a video feed from the new message Trent received earlier.

“This is from a space bar.” Trent pointed to a figure in the background. “That’s one of the Earthlings: A female named Kally Parker.”

Bront looked on anxiously as Trent forwarded the video to a point where someone approached her.

“Who’s that?” asked Bront.

“You’re going to love this, Chief,” started Trent, with a huge smile on his face, “That’s Dorian. He’s the best bounty hunter out there.”

Bront looked at Trent. “How long ago was this, Trent?” he asked. “Has she been retrieved yet?”

“It was from earlier today,” answered Trent. “I tried contacting Dorian directly, but he’s not answering. I’ve worked with him before, though and if he’s on the case, we have nothing to worry about.”

Bront looked back at the video to see the girl ducking behind the bar. “What the-” he stated.

“Huh,” said Trent forwarding the feed again to show a Rayzer show up and begin to interrogate Dorian. The two eventually left, but Dorian returned a short time later. Trent resumed normal playback and the two watched as Dorian grabbed a Zaxian and smashed his head down to the bar. Dorian and Kally left shortly after. He appeared to be offering her a ride.

“Who were those other two?” asked Bront.

“I didn’t recognize the Zaxian,” responded Trent. “But the Rayzer from earlier was Fritz, another bounty hunter. He’s OK.”

“Two bounty hunters?” asked Bront rhetorically. “That’s a good sign. Maybe we’ll get this all sorted out soon.”

“Well, the bounties are certainly high enough,” said Trent. “It’s surprising they’ve been this evasive for so long. I guess they’ve just been lucky to avoid any areas with informants, like this bartender.”

A loud chime echoed throughout the huge room and Trent nearly fell over. Bront motioned him toward the exit. “You better leave, Trent,” he said. “The meeting is starting.”

Trent nodded and skipped down the stairs making his way out of the room. He could hear Lead-Chief Holden in the distance beginning the opening ceremonies as he strolled back to his office.

He was relieved he got to speak with Bront before the meeting was in progress. He was even more relieved he finally had good news for him. The only thing gnawing in his mind was the fact that Dorian hadn’t contacted him yet. Sure, he shows up with bounties unannounced all the time, but this was different. There was a lot of money riding on this for Dorian. And there was a lot more riding on it for Trent, or so he felt deep down. He had nothing to worry about though, but that didn’t stop him.

Trent leaned back in his chair, deep in thought. Dorian must have known about the bounty. He sent it to him directly earlier that day. What are the odds he was just giving her a ride anyway? He must have been up to something. Trent just hated not knowing.

That’s when it hit him. He couldn’t get in touch with Dorian yet, but there was someone else there he could try asking: Fritz. He was there too. By Trent’s own admission, Fritz wasn’t the best bounty hunter out there. But that’s not to say he was good-for-nothing. Sure, he wasn’t the smartest person, or even average at times, but he had brought in his fair share of bounties. Sometimes he even caught the most unexpected ones. He was resourceful and trustworthy. Trent was sure he could find out more from him.

A sharp wave of his hand swept all the images off the screen and an image of Fritz’s face appeared and began spinning slowly.

“Come on, Fritz, answer.”

The image disappeared and a video feed of Fritz in his spaceship filled the screen.

“Trent!” he yelled. “Long time no see!”

“Likewise.” Trent looked toward him in the screen intently. “Listen, Fritz, I was wondering if you could help me with something.”

[WP] A new quiet girl joins your class

The new girl just sat down next to me. There were plenty of seats. She walked passed two empty rows, down one spot, and grabbed the desk next to mine. And-she-smiled-at-me. I'm not really sure what they mean when they say "it's on," but it's on. Wait, did I even smile back? Better smile again to be sure. Nice, good smile.

She's so pretty. Her dark, flowy hair seems to go on forever and her adorable sundress gives her a glow that embodies the recently ended summer. Wow, I should be a poet.

"Hi."

"Hi!"

She smiled at me again!

I need to start a conversation. If I mess this up, that's it. She'll think I'm not interested. I know, I'll ask her name.

"Ella Myers?"

It's attendance already? When did everyone else get here?

"Here."

"Andy Danvers?"

"Here."

^{"Nice to meet you, Ella."}

^{"You too, Andy."}

"No talking, please."

She's holding back a laugh and it's the cutest thing. I can't help but keep looking in her direction. Everything she does is the most interesting thing I've ever seen. The way her eyes focus on the teacher as he's talking. How she leans her head on her hand while she takes notes. And especially the way she itches her nose from time to time.

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG

Class is over already? I didn't even think of what to say to her. I have to ask her to lunch. Or ask her to hang out after school. Or-

"Andy? Can I see you for a second?"

What now? She's leaving, this better be quick.

"I couldn't help but notice that you weren't paying attention at all today, Andy."

She's still right outside the room, but it looks like a group formed around her. I could swear I heard the words "lunch," and "after school."

"I'm sorry, I was a little distracted."

"I noticed."

He glanced toward Ella in the hall. Was I that obvious? I hope she didn't know I was staring.

"Just leave it for outside of class. OK, Andy?"

"Sure."

I can't see her anymore. She's not in the hallway. Great. Off to English class it is then. Maybe I'll-

"Hey, Andy. Can you help me find room 205? I have to get to English class."