I'm 26M, and honestly, I feel like I'm watching my life pass by without actually living it.

For almost six years, I've been stuck in the same cycle of overthinking, procrastination, avoidance and regret. I have ambitions, expectations and dreams for myself, but my actions have never matched them. I constantly imagine a better version of my life, make plans, research different possibilities, get motivated for a while and then somehow return to doing nothing.

I completed my education a few years ago, but haven't managed to establish a career or become financially independent. I spent considerable time preparing for competitive government examinations and explored other career options, including data science and technical fields. I'm still confused about which direction to take. It's not that I'm unwilling to work hard. I'm willing to put in the effort, but I can't seem to make a decision and commit to it. I'm terrified of choosing the wrong path and wasting even more years.

But honestly, my career is only one part of the problem.

I've struggled with anxiety, fear, overthinking and avoidance for years. I constantly worry about how people perceive me. Even small embarrassing interactions can stay in my head for days and send me into a spiral. I avoid situations where I might feel judged or uncomfortable.

Things that seem completely normal to others can feel like enormous challenges to me: going outside, talking to strangers, attending interviews, applying for jobs, driving a car, riding a bike, attending social gatherings or initiating conversations.

During university, I would sometimes skip lectures and spend hours gaming instead. I kept postponing responsibilities, telling myself I'd become serious later. I had opportunities to learn, make friends, develop skills and experience university life, but I repeatedly avoided them.

I feel like I didn't just waste educational opportunities. I missed out on life itself.

I still repeat the same behaviour. I get interested in something, spend a few hours exploring it and then lose interest completely. This happens with hobbies, learning, career plans and almost everything else. Even things I enjoy don't seem to hold my attention for long. I struggle to maintain consistency with almost anything.

The hardest part is that I sometimes feel like I'm deliberately sabotaging my own life.

I know what I want. I know time is passing. I know what I should be doing. Yet I repeatedly do the opposite. I avoid opportunities, escape into temporary distractions, postpone important decisions and choose short-term comfort even when I know I'll regret it later.

It's almost as if I'm watching myself make the same mistakes repeatedly, fully aware of the consequences, but unable to stop. I make plans to change, sometimes feel genuinely motivated, but eventually return to the same habits. I don't understand why I keep doing this to myself when I desperately want my life to change.

Another thing that hurts is my relationship with friends and people my age. I've been humiliated, compared and made to feel small because of where I am in life. There have been moments when things people said or did affected me so much that I cried. I keep replaying those experiences in my head, feeling ashamed of myself and wondering why I can't change my circumstances despite knowing how much they hurt.

I see people around me progressing with their lives, building careers, earning money, travelling, forming relationships and experiencing things I haven't. I don't necessarily envy their success as much as I feel heartbroken about my own situation.

The scariest part is how quickly time seems to be passing. Months disappear before I realise it. Sometimes a whole year feels like it has gone by in seconds, and I'm still in exactly the same position. I keep telling myself I'll change tomorrow, next month or next year. But years have passed, and I'm still having the same conversations with myself.

My family situation makes everything harder. I lost my father at a young age, and my mother has struggled enormously to raise me despite financial difficulties and her own health challenges. I desperately want to support her and become independent, but I feel guilty about reaching 26 without having done much.

I need to start earning. I can't afford to keep spending years figuring out what I want while my financial situation gets worse.

Sometimes I think about studying again, learning something completely new or starting a career from scratch. But the thought of reaching 30 and still trying to establish myself feels terrifying. I don't even know what I genuinely enjoy or whether I'll be able to stay committed to anything.

I've struggled with my mental health for a long time and tried therapy, but I still feel stuck. I don't understand whether my problems come from anxiety, fear, avoidance, lack of discipline, self-sabotage or something deeper. I just know that understanding my problems hasn't been enough to change them.

I don't want a life where I simply survive, work in something I hate and spend every day wishing I were somewhere else. I want a career, financial independence, friendships, experiences and the ability to enjoy ordinary things without constantly being afraid or overthinking.

I'm not expecting to become successful overnight. I just want to feel like I'm finally living instead of watching life pass me by.

I'm not looking for generic advice like "you're still young" or "just be disciplined."

I know I need to take responsibility for changing my life. I just don't understand why I've found it so difficult to do so for almost six years.

I don't want to waste my remaining life and realise that I've spent another years thinking, planning, regretting, sabotaging myself and doing nothing.

I never really had any interests, everything people I knew from my estate was interested in I was against of. I never had childhood, I don't remember any cartoon, any book, anything. People were playing and going out without my presence. From 7 to 8 grade I was average in terms of grades but completely out of any social group. Spent 7 years from 1st class of high school bedrotting, wasting time completely. I cannot even remember one thing I watched, listened to or sum. I spent around 60% of my life in a fucking bed. Only thing I can do is yawn, I cannot even listen to podcasts while sitting, I get bored ultra fast and I think my brain wants to go to bed. I am ultra skinny in era of overeating. I cannot even understand simple jokes. I'd love to work as a delivery driver but I don't know anything about bikes and my legs are near atrophy. I also don't have a hobby. My "hobbies" was f.e. playing violin "for the half of my life" which now I cannot do better than a 3rd grader. I wasted nearly 22 years of my life, I will be a college dropout with no perspectives. I worked for 160 hrs combined my whole life, my CV looks rubbish

Cate McHugh's won The Voice UK 2026.
Have you seen? if no, look it up.
Watching her step onto that massive stage and just completely own it- all while raising a family without her sight- is genuinely unreal. WOW.

She said one line that gave me actual chills:

"You can still fly with broken wings."

It hit me. Very hard. I've got chills all over. Tears in my eyes.

Most of us spend so much time waiting for the "perfect moment".
Or we let our self-doubt talk us out of things, our dreams before we even try.

Meanwhile, she didn't let a massive life hurdle stop her from chasing what she wanted.

Whatever is holding you back right now doesn't get to decide what you're capable of.

Stop waiting for the perfect moment, because it’s not coming.
Just go for it.

What’s one thing you’ve been putting off because you didn't feel "ready"?
Drop it in the comments. Maybe today’s the day you finally start.

Cate McHugh blind mum of two is thewinner of The Voice UK 2026

I’m wondering how other people approach life. I’m having a hard time filling in my free time in life, because I have no motivation for anything. My free time is spent waiting until I have to work again, because work is the only thing that gets me out of the house.

I know I should try things, do sports, find hobbies, meet with friends, but I honestly can’t bring it up anymore. Everything feels like a chore and if I do something I always run on discipline instead of motivation. I spent my time just.. waiting.

I’ve had this for as long as I know. I’ve tried scheduling things even though I don’t feel like planning them. I’ve tried years of therapy. I’ve tried medication. I tried spiritual healing, meditation, changing my outlook on life, gratefulness journals. I feel like I’ve tried everything and I still feel like I am ruining my life. I had potential, and now I am just a sad shell of who I used to be.

On my free days and free hours I get so sad because I am not living my life. I am just existing. And I don’t know how to stop. I feel like a failure. I don’t experience any excitement towards plans. I am not building something (I don’t know how to create a goal because I feel so disconnected I don’t know what the hell my goal should be). And I don’t know how to experience joy anymore.

Please give me your best unhinged advice. I’ve tried to solve this for years so consider every basic solution already tried, please.

Think about it. Some of the people who will mean the most to you are still strangers. Some of your happiest memories haven't happened. There are places you'll love that you don't even know exist. And somewhere in the future, there's a version of you who will look back at this difficult time and be incredibly grateful that you kept going. Don't mistake the life you have right now for the entire life you're going to have. So much can still change. Including you.

This is horrible. I always fail at what I try to do in the most stupid way by repeating the most stupid mistakes no matter how hard I try to get better. I think I'm genuinely a subpar person and I can't stop loathing myself for this and it makes me want to not try anything anymore because I feel it's pointless and I will just fail and hate myself for it.

If I'm just bad at everything well it's how I am and as long as I'm doing the best I can I shouldn't be ashamed nor hate myself for this right ? I know I should just do my thing and never compare myself to others and be happy with what I got and be happy that I'm at least alive in good health and that I'm still trying but why is it so difficult ?

How do I keep at it knowing all too well that I'm not as fit for it as the next person ? How do I just fail miserably and go like "oh well it's ok we'll try again" knowing that the next try will probably end the exact same way ? How do people brush off that awful feeling of self-hate and keep at it ?

What is the secret to looking back on life with zero regrets? In this episode, host William Cooper sits down with friend, bestselling author, filmmaker, and publisher Michael McKinley to discuss the art of living boldly. Together, they unpack why young people often fear taking creative and professional risks, how to embrace failures as essential stepping stones, and the profound role service plays in living a fulfilling life. McKinley shares personal wisdom passed down from his father, offering a fresh perspective on how to view risk, navigate career pivots, and write your own story with confidence.

To be more specific, I am having issues keeping up with the house. I'm super busy, the house's massive for how few of us are. It used to be more full but those days are long gone and I'm the gravekeeper in charge of a dead place.

I want to make the place alive again, even if it won't be the same, I want it to be a proper home. I'm struggling with my motivation but I've been looking at some ideas, maybe not a full garden but starting with a couple pot plants and so on, and I'd like to know an outside perspective.

It's so easy to see someone achieving something and immediately start questioning your own progress.

Even when you're doing well, it can suddenly feel like you're behind.

I've been trying to focus more on whether I'm moving toward my own goals instead of measuring everything against someone else's timeline.

What helps you stay focused on your own progress?

Last year, I was hospitalized with a serious heart rhythm issue called AFib. Afterward, I went on a beach trip to recover. I was weak, withdrawing from nicotine, and miserable.

I didn’t make it down to the beach. I sat on the porch staring at the palm trees. There was a pack of colored pencils and a pad in front of me, so I started drawing.
I had already been sober for a few years and was still learning how to handle life and my emotions without alcohol. Drawing became something I hadn’t known I needed. I kept going, and at 40 I began painting.

These are three paintings I’ve made since. Between work and raising two boys, I now make time for classes and painting every week. It’s become a way to understand myself and something I’m excited to keep learning.

Has a difficult time in your life led you to discover something you never expected to love?

I’m currently a first year undergrad in college (first quarter) and I genuinely feel so behind. I attempted to join clubs and activities in the beginning of the school year, but I put it off because I realized I have to get my shit together first. I’m attempting to become more fit, study more often, try new hobbies/interests, and overall, build routines. However, I feel like while i’m barely building myself up, everyone else has already gotten started building their future. Like, getting internships, making friends, clubs, creativity, and a balance of their life. While i’m here struggling to manage my classes and figuring out who I am.

Everyone is already networking, making a name for themselves, and just have something going for them. I know this is common, but I just feel so lost. I’m so privileged to attend college and have a supporting family, but I can’t even keep up with everyone else. It just makes me think i’m too late to ever succeed or just don’t have what it takes.

I’m aware everyone is going through this, but why does it seem like everyone is starting ahead of me? or just knows a secret hack of life that i dont know, ifykwim

Edit: Tysm for everyone who replied. I’ll keep showing up even if i’m not sure why. Ill go on my own pace, I think I just needed people to tell me that it’s ok to. Ill take everyones advice in mind! :)

Most goals fail because they are too big to picture. randomly choosing to get fit or be disciplined gives your brain nothing to do on a Tuesday evening.

Pick one thing for the next 7 days. Make it small enough that it feels almost too easy, like a 10 minute walk or 20 minutes of study. Tell one person what you plan to do, and ask them to check in with you at the end of the week.

A week of small actions you kept compounds into big results

What is the one small thing you will do this week?

It's easy to wait for the perfect time to start exercising.

A less busy schedule, more energy, better weather, or even a new piece of equipment can all become reasons to delay.

But sometimes the biggest change comes from making the first step smaller.

Instead of planning a long workout, it could be a short walk, a few sets of basic exercises, or just 15 minutes of movement.

What small action helped you stop procrastinating and become more consistent?

I'd love to hear practical examples rather than just motivational quotes.

Saturday morning gym motivation 🙂

https://youtu.be/7b8ocsZVf40?si=2OEV9hGif767Uu6U

RIP

Not my video

I've been having this deep burning feeling lately, and I want to share it with some of you guys who feel insecure. This is me writing this from top of mind, straight out of my heart. No AI BS, no revisions.

Insight into my life. I've felt like an imposter my entire life. I never felt cool, I always felt like...I didn't matter and everyone around me mattered more. I never cared about myself. I work really hard to be successful and always feel maybe 15% as qualified to speak on anything compared to others. I always feel like I'm not enough, and I can't outcompete others. And no, I'm not being humble. I genuinely can never speak highly of myself. I feel like I'm a nobody.

Fast forward years later, I deal with chronic pain and that made everything so much worse. I feel like, I legit can't amount to anything because I'm automatically, at baseline, "handicapped" compared to everyone else. I have these big dreams and feel like I can never do it. Ever. The pain I have forces me to think that I'm different than everyone else. And it's been this prison mindset that convinced me to consider everyone else as stress free and content with their lives. I used to rant to people about my pain, only to get responses like "wow, if i had that pain, I wouldn't know how I can live with myself." Yeah man thanks, that didn't help me. It made me feel so sorry for myself. I felt like a victim of something horrific. Even worse, I want to give up on my dreams everyday.

My pain with these insecurities, I can never enjoy anything. I get caught up in my head and feel depressed all the time.

But you know, after years with this pain, something in me is waking up. It's almost like it wants me to say "FUCK YOU" to everybody and everything that did me wrong. I'm tired of hearing others opinions about me. I'm sick of assuming everyone is smarter than me. I feel like it's time to really take myself seriously. I am smart. I am a hard worker. I AM worth something. The pain and the insecurities aren't me...it's what me thinks of me. Why the hell does anyone have the right to say who I am? Or speak to me in a certain way?

We all have 24 hours a day. 7 days a week. Why do I automatically think people are more qualified than me even though I outwork them? Why is everyone smarter than me, and I am the dumbest person around?

I know I sound crazy. But whatever you're going through, don't let it make you crazy. You aren't crazy. All that "man i'm so sorry to hear that" or "wow, that must be so difficult to live with" is NOISE. NOISE from people that are feeding you these thoughts so you can now perceive yourself in that way. STOP giving those people power. Step up, you're worth it.

Let's lock in boys. I'm tired of this BS. No matter what, I'll be fighting till my last breath. I don't care what you're going through, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Give it your all. You know why? Because that's who you are.

TL;DR: We're all human beings, regardless of our backgrounds, beliefs, politics, or circumstances. Life is too short to spend it hating one another. Be kind, love yourself and others, forgive yourself, take responsibility for your mistakes, and remember that you can make a difference in somebody's life with even the smallest gesture. The world still has good in it. Be some of that good. One decision at a time.

Whatever you are dealing with, whatever life circumstances have made you who you are, whether you are rich, poor, somewhere in the middle, or define wealth in the true way by how many friends and family surround you, I wish you peace today.

We are more than political parties, religious groups, races, ethnic groups, and members of countries. These are groups that only become meaningful because we identify with them and give them importance. But what if we believe there is another group? A group of people all around the world whose only connecting factor is that they care about other people and want to make the world better?

This isn't to sell anything. It's not to try to get you to buy into anything. It's to remind you who you are, who we ALL are. That we are not many groups but ONE. We are members of the human race, and we should love one another.

Because I believe that when you hurt another, you hurt yourself. When you help another, you help yourself. That is a very simple belief that has carried me far this year.

It's been one of the hardest years of my life, but it's also been one with the biggest blessings. Because what the world has taken away from me, I have replaced with much better things. Gifts of the spirit. God has truly blessed me, and I'm thankful to be here, alive, and healthy enough to write this.

I don't even know if anybody will read it or take it to heart. But I sincerely hope you will. I hope that whatever you personally are struggling with, you get a break from it, and even if nobody else does, that you are able to help yourself make life better.

This year, a lot of times, all I've had is myself in a lot of ways. I am thankful for even that.

I know this world seems dark sometimes, and people can be cruel. I know WE can even find ourselves being this way sometimes when we are lost and feel we have no choice.

I'm just here to tell you today: EVERY DAY is a choice. Every single moment. Even if the only kindness you can muster is for yourself, that matters.

Love yourself. Love others. Be kind.

That kindness that you give to somebody might come back and help somebody else, and then it helps another, and another, and on down the way.

There are two choices in this life: Love and Fear. And I know I am choosing love.

I'm getting old, and this world gets more confusing every day, but I get less confused as I grow closer to myself and God in turn, and to the truth that material things have never mattered beyond keeping us alive so we can spread more love and kindness and ensure we are helping each other lead fulfilling lives.

People sometimes turn bitter or lose their way in life because they get beaten down so much and try SO very hard for years and years, sometimes seeing no results. But I am here to tell you that even these things can become blessings given enough time and care. Because we can grow as people from them if we choose to. It's all in how you look at things. The entirety of life is all about perception, i would dare say the MEANING of life is about learning to percieve things in a way that lifts you up instead of breaks you or others down. See? It all leads back to love and away from fear.

Sometimes we make mistakes. We stumble. We fall. That's how we grow. Those mistakes are not necessarily mistakes at all, but learning opportunities. We live in a world nowadays that punishes people for making mistakes, but how else can they learn? How else can they find better ways to do things?

I've also realized that one of the biggest differences between a good and an evil person is the decisions they keep making.

We are all just a series of memories and decisions we choose. THAT IS US. Not some nonexistent phantom in the past or the future, but THIS MOMENT, right now.

Let go of all your hurt from the past and stop letting it make you think that that is YOU. You are not those things. You are the decisions you make every single moment, every single day.

You can become a new person at any given moment. You're only one choice away from starting that new life.

ONE CHOICE.

Those things that happened still happened. There are effects and things that will go with us throughout life. But what I'm saying is we don't have to let those things define us.

That story where you struggle today could be one that inspires others to lift themselves out of that ditch, to truly live and shine, and then hopefully help others too!

This matters more than you realize.

We can literally change the world if we ALL START following our hearts and stop following the lies this world feeds us about materialism, imaginary lines on maps, and made-up "parties" and groups and this, that, and the other.

Choose love for your fellow person, not fear.

Fear of the unknown. Fear of being abandoned. Fear of being misunderstood. Fear of being rejected. Fear of being disliked, etc.

All those things can happen, yes. But at least you will have tried. At least you will be putting your best foot forward and not giving in to all that is currently happening in the world.

You might say, "Well, what can I do as ONE person? I'm nobody. I can't do much. I'm not rich, I'm not handsome or beautiful, I'm not really strong or smart," or a whole long list of things.

But you do have a voice, and somebody out there needs to hear it.

There is SOMEBODY you can reach. Somebody you can help. And doesn't it matter if you help just one person smile and remember themselves and that life ain't so bad?

WE all matter.

You matter, reading this. Your family matters. Your kids matter. Your friends matter.

Even the lost people who have forgotten themselves and who hurt people and have chosen to abandon what is good in the world. Even they matter.

Because remember? They are just one decision away from being redeemed and being able to help others.

If you are struggling with something you've done that maybe you're not proud of, know too that if you take accountability and work hard, you can grow even past that.

I did something earlier this year I was very ashamed of, but I realized it happened for a reason. To bring me here, NOW, this moment, this day, this path I'm on to live a better life, to heal, to help others, and to love people.

Even if they don't understand me, don't like me, or even hate me.

I love you anyway.

I don't even know you. Doesn't matter. You're a person, and you matter.

No matter your beliefs, your sexual orientation, your politics, your country, whether you can walk or you ride in a really cool chair with jet boosters. LOL.

I just am asking all of us to please take a moment to tell somebody thank you. Or give a hug, or tell somebody you appreciate them or love them, or open a door, or carry some stuff in for somebody.

You get the idea.

Anything matters and counts. EVERYTHING counts in this life.

That is the only thing we take with us when we go. It's the only thing. We are only here for a brief time.

Please make that count.

Be honest.
Be kind.
Be loyal.
Love and be loved.

Be kind to yourself. Even if nobody else will. Love yourself and give yourself grace to learn and grow. That matters. Sometimes it helps to hear that.

I wished sometimes I had somebody write something like this to me, so that's the only reason I'm writing this: to let you know I see you and you matter.

There is still good in the world.

You can be that good too.

That's how it grows.

One decision at a time.

This world has a LOT of darkness, and it's important that those of us who are able stand up however we can and help others.

Because we can't make other people do anything. We can't control how people treat us, but we can ALWAYS control how we respond to them.

I decided I am going to try my best to always respond with kindness. Even if that person hates me or despises me, I don't have to return that hatred. I can wish them well while still respecting myself and maintaining my boundaries.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Take care.

I don't understand why does the brain like remorse or sobotaging mode when your in a bad phase in life. I mean I don't understand. Instead of being hopeful and positive we tend to like be negative and scan for the more bad in life and then connect with the past events that was bad too.

Because it's been so long, and I know they're going to push me hard, I'm just kinda dreading it? I have fibromyalgia so I know a month off is going to have impacted me, and I'm just nervous and losing motivation with getting back into it.

Anyone have any advice?

I first want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who commented on my post from a few days ago. I have been dealing with a needle phobia since childhood & have in the past totally panicked or avoided needles. Seriously I had an allergic reaction to shellfish a few years ago & didn’t tell anyone because I was so afraid of getting a shot & I was lucky that a Benadryl took care of it.

Anyways- got my flu shot & I DID NOT panic. I could feel my heart racing- but I did not totally panic. As many of you suggested I told the nurse beforehand, didn’t look, and even got myself a sweet drink. I am proud to say it didn’t really hurt too much (tbh getting pricked my sewing needle sucks even more haha).

I feel so proud of myself I did this & so happy I won’t get the flu. I just wanted to tell you all thank you so much for your advice, motivation, and sharing your story. Thank you so much! ❤️

My motivation has been pretty down lately, even for things I know I enjoy. What motivates you do good things for youself?

For the past year I was sick and injured, I had insomnia and brain fog. I also couldn’t work out because of pain.

I’m doing much better now, but after this stressful period I don’t feel motivated to start back on my old habits and regaining lost progress.

I’m not unhappy, but my daily life has felt a bit dull lately and I’m wondering what motivates to do activities you enjoy.