https://imgur.com/a/Ma5yJAX - Here's the evidence. The guy was trying to force the girl to have a private chat with him despite her being extremely uncomfortable and asking him to play with her as a group instead. No big deal if he doesn't want to join the group, but trying to make her feel bad for it and talk to her the way he did is a pretty big no-no. He then proceeded to make different accounts (after they kicked him from the group) and harassed her friend that he added off discord.

Last time I checked, this wasn't a sub for you to find girls to have forced 1 on 1 time with. Please do not add this man/if you do, be careful. His name is OnexEyedxKing on Reddit and his discord is Ryanx#6969

Note: I am not the person in these screenshots, just making the post for her because she's not comfortable doing it and I don't want any girl or guy here to have to deal with this guy. I use this sub as well.

Y’all only reply to posts that mention that the OP is a female. If the post don’t got that then you don’t wanna interact with it. Instead of trying to look for your “gamer girlfriend” and actually message/interact with anyone despite them being male or female then you’d might get somewhere. You’re all down bad and tend to forget that this is NOT a dating subreddit. Don’t try and pull that bullshit “I speak better to women” excuse. You wanna be in a relationship that bad? Use fuckin’ dating apps. That’s what they’re there for.

DISCORD NAME: Asheroth#1184

He sent me an unsolicited video of him masturbating. Save yourself the trouble and don't even bother adding this asshole. HE HAS SINCE CHANGED NAMES/PICS!:

https://imgur.com/a/u2RkWEY

Be careful out there, ladies!

As someone that's started streaming, I would highly recommend it if you are feeling like chatting with people about the game you love - the higher end of streamers with big numbers aren't gonna have the time to interact with you, however, those with smaller viewerships will firstly greatly appreciate the interaction, as it provides them with something to talk about and keep the momentum of the stream, as well as the majority will be more than willing to play with you if that's what you are looking for! Give it a go - this is not self promotion as I'm not gonna link my Twitch nor do I have it on my history, it's just a thought that maybe some of you could bear in mind! Stay safe people!

Seems like the only posts getting any recognition on here are from thirsty-ass guys looking to game primarily with women. Gotta say, it’s pretty pathetic. Where are the actual gamers just looking for people to play with? Because this ain’t the sub to find your dream gamer girl.

Steam Id: 64930193

I hate getting chat messages saying oh we have 50 members and we play all sorts of games. Like dude, just because I want to find one or 2 people doesn't mean I want to join a group with 50 people who I will never play with. It gets ridiculous. I haven't been able to find anyone to play Cod with, all I get are these copy and pasted messages saying basically the same thing. I'm not here to boost your numbers I'm here looking for new friends to have a good time.

Just need to rant for a minute to get some things out.

Tell your friends you love them.

On Monday, i lost my best friend. He was only 27. Ive known him since 2nd grade and practically lived at his house part time with the amount of time we spent together. ​Enough time that my mom genuinely had to ask me if him and I were gay and together lol. We flowed in and out of constant contact for the majority of our middle school/ highschool years, but eventually became a nightly gaming duo. In 2022, I moved halfway across the country to pursue a new chapter in life, and I would only get to see him once or twice a year when I'd come back home.

We've played so many games together that I can't even count them all. From the chaotic hell that is Left for Dead 2 mods, to the calm serenity that is a group minecraft server. And that is where a good amount of the pain lies. The soul crushing reality that ill never get to save the princess in castle crashers, or defeat the Covenant again ​with my player 2. And now it feels impossible to even look at those games on my steam library. Forcing myself to play games while either talking with my other best friends, or watching a stream just so I don't feel alone.

I lost a piece of me that day, and the world got a whole lot less funny.

Rest easy brother, ill see you on the other side.

Hey there Gamerpals.

There's been a long history of posts on the subreddit that have tried to address the elephant in the room that is /r/gamerpals being used by (mostly) men to find women with unsavory motives beyond just playing games. Having run this subreddit since the subscriber count ran in the hundreds I and the other moderators are not blind to the issue and while we have done our best to try and uphold our rules this has been a thing that stood out like a sore thumb more and more as the subreddit grew.

While women rarely get sincere replies and are overloaded with men willing to jump through flaming hoops at a chance to play with them regardless of what game it is, it can feel terrible when others create high effort posts that yield little results. While it isn't uncommon for users to get no replies, it can make users feel really bad knowing that their gender plays part in how popular they could be.

We've treated the non-dating portion of /r/gamerpals seriously. Every post that even hinted at trying to look for the opposite gender was removed and thousands of accounts have been banned over years of moderation but when you sort the subreddit by top posts it is clear that this issue persists.

So with that we will be changing the rules, both as an attempt to solve the issue but also as an experiment to see whether this will be a detriment or boon to the subreddit. Of course we stick to our non-dating rule but now it is no longer allowed to state your gender in a post with the exception of people who specifically want to play with people of their own gender. This last bit is important to us because we have seen a trend in women trying to find other women to play with because they want to avoid being harassed by men simply for their gender. Of course men are also fully in their right to just ask for other men to play with provided none of these posts are aimed at dating, it's a modern world.

This means that a lot of new moderation work lies ahead of us. We of course don't intend to backtrack 7 years of posts to remove them but we will be having to remove a lot of posts from users that do state their gender. It might be considered a fairly sizable job so we're going to need more active moderators on board to keep an eye on that. If you're interested please send me a message with your credentials privately.

This also means users can now report posts for stating their gender. We hope the community is willing to help us out in filtering posts. We read every report that comes in and act according to our rules to the best of our ability. There are thousands of eyes on the subreddit and there is only so much a small team of moderators can do so we sincerely hope you can contribute where we fall short.

TLDR:

• We're recruiting active moderators, preferably with experience on other subreddits.

• stating gender is now against the rules, unless you specifically look for people of your own gender. (no-dating still in play).

• We ask our users to help us out by reporting violators as we do actually see and handle every report that comes in.

Happy gaming!

I know this should be posted in r/rant or r/vent but it’s going here because this is a place it belongs.

Just because someone is a female who plays video games doesn’t mean you can harass them or add them and be a whole fucking pervert. I post on this subreddit and PSNFriends pretty frequently and up until recently it was fine. Nobody /seemed/ to care that I was a chick but not sure what happened between my last post and the other day.

“Oh I will play Apex or Destiny with you but can I see your tits?” is really not acceptable. Especially from grown men. Y’all acting like that are the reasons girls quit getting on games and it makes it harder for other girls to make friends. Chill out because you won’t get your dick wet from a 21yr old 3000mi away from you homie.

TL;DR? Stop being an actual pervert to females in these subs.

Would love to find girls or guys in my age bracket that enjoy gaming! I know it’s rare! Right now I’m playing fallout 76, seven days to die, Diablo III, the division, and the forest. I love the younger crowd that I’m gaming with!!! But I know my age group is out there somewhere gaming

Tired of this community constantly ghosting people. People need to understand that not everyone is the same and that everyone has a life they have to live. I have replied to a lot of people in this community about looking for gaming friends and I have given up my time from my kids and my fiancee at times just to help others feel better about having no one to play games with. I recently had someone I considered a friend kick me from his server and deleted me because I've been busy. I'm a 28 Male that has two sons that are both 3. My kids and my fiancee come first before anything but some people dont seem to get that and dont understand how hard it can be having to be a parent. Gaming and other things come last because your kids and relationship with your gf, fiancee, or wife comes first before anything and anyone. Us dads and moms can still have friends and still play games we just have responsibilities that others dont have. Just because we dont get to games that much or as busy doesn't mean we dont friends. We need that outlet after long days with kids. We need that fellowship where we can laugh and have fun. We need that ear to listen to us vent or just talk. It's so easy for everyone in this community to want friends but easier to ghost people and not care how they feel. I'm disappointed in how everyone I gave my time to just simply remove me or dont make a effort to talk. I understand some people have jobs, lives, anxiety, and are scared to make a effort at times but there are some genuine people here that are longing for friends and long term friends. Stop ghosting and give people chances. Some may argue or have differences but that's what makes us different. Learn to respect each other.

I'm not saying it should be changed back to before but it just created a new problem of people wasting other people's time.

I reached out to several people on here and after they can't tell that I'm a female I get responses like this. This is the 5th dude I've made plans to game with, they couldn't tell if I was a chick or not and then everything comes to a halt.

Can these people just get banned from here?

I saw a post on Wednesday and made a comment. Started chatting and they seemed quite friendly so we moved over to discord and added each other on Steam and even picked out a few games. We made plans to play over the weekend (I thought it was a bit strange to make a post so early on then, but hey, we all have lives). I sent a message yesterday asking for a time period of when we could play. No response. Checked in today- I'm removed from discord, reddit and steam....like, why even engage in the first place? It's such a disappointment. I could've been trying to talk with someone else and have other games, along with my time, prepped for something or someone else.

I don't know, it's just so weird. Sorry for the rant.

I see 99% of male posts get barely any reactions if any and female ones get so many they barely can keep up. Is it one of those reddits again where men secretly are looking for a girlfriend? What a horrible reality to live in... None of these subreddits work ever :(

If you keep looking for friends but never really connect, here’s why you keep ending up right back here looking again:

1. You're treating it like speed dating, not building real friendships. People don’t become friends with one message or a quick game session. You have to put in effort over time, get to know each other, and make real connections. If you just want a quick fix or don’t take the time to actually talk, then you’re missing the point of building relationships in the first place.

2. You’re not following through. It’s like a first date where you talk, have fun, and then... that’s it. No follow-up, no more effort. Real friendships take time and mutual interest. If you aren’t willing to put in the work after someone reaches out, don’t be surprised if they stop reaching out. They’re just as much a person looking for connection as you are.

3. Why do you keep coming back here? If you’re constantly asking for friends but not actually investing in the ones you find, you’re just setting yourself up for the same disappointment. Instead of bouncing from one random person to the next, try nurturing the friendships you do have. Put the effort into someone who’s already shown an interest in you.

4. It’s not a numbers game. Just because you have 10 people who ‘say’ they’re down to game doesn’t mean you’ve found 10 true friends. The more you jump around looking for anyone to game with, the less likely you are to find meaningful connections. Focus on quality, not quantity.

Here are some tips to actually make and maintain friendships:

• Ask genuine questions about the person to get to know them. It doesn’t have to be anything deep—maybe you both like the same TV shows or movies? Start there, watch something together, and discuss what you thought about it.

• Follow up on conversations. Ask what they thought about the show you watched, or what they’ve been up to. Keep the conversation going. It’s about mutual interest and effort.

• Share experiences. Watch something together, play a game, or even just chat about something you both enjoy. But do this more than once! This builds camaraderie and shows you care about their time and interests.

I have to wonder what some of you actually want from being here? I’ve seen posts about how many people say they’re “looking for friends” but then just play games together and disappear. Or, they send a “hey” to a DM and never respond after. That’s not how friendships work.

I'm even seeing the same people I reached out to 2 months ago, still looking for friends and not having any current friends to play with........

Do you know what a friend is?
Do you know how to maintain friendships?
I’m not trying to be rude, but are you here because you don’t know how to socialize? It’s okay if that’s the case. Making friends isn’t like dating—treating it like one-night stands will never get you the lasting connections you’re looking for.

Friendships take time and effort, but they’re so worth it.
Over the years, I’ve met some truly amazing people, and we’re still friends to this day. I’m always looking to make new friends, so we can game, chill, and build bonds together. But here’s the thing—you don’t see me posting every few days asking for friends with a template. That’s not how it works. I actually take the time to reach out, engage, and get to know people, and that’s how I’ve built the friendships I have now.

If you really want to make lasting connections, the key is to put in the effort. I truly hope this helps anyone here who’s looking to build stronger, more meaningful friendships.

I joined this group hoping to find a gaming pal or even a irl friend to actually make a friendship with yet the main thing I see in this group is blatant favoritism.

Like the main thing I see is girls post getting more engagement than a guy's post when it shouldn't be like that! it let's me know that some of you guys out there don't want an actual buddy if that's the case cool but take it elsewhere.

Cuz I'm not here for that i just want a friend an actual friend who cares to hangout with me and game sometimes. Idc about your race or gender or whatever you choose to identify as! I'm just tryna find a friend.

So after making my own (unsuccessful) post and looking around on the subreddit for a while, I’ve noticed that there seems to be some pretty unfortunate trends here.

The first one being that a lot of people seem to just invite you to their discord server with 300+ people in them and never follow up, I understand you want people in your server but it kinda seems to defeat the purpose of the subreddit?

And the second one being the fact that women get significantly more attention on here and not always the good kind, which is to be expected I suppose given the crowd. Just creepy.

And the third just being that people will add you and never ask to play or respond, wack.

I’m on here because I got injured in a way that has made it where I can’t walk for a while, so I turned to video games as a source of entertainment. I lost all my gaming buddies from when I was younger so I’m trying to get a little group going, but unfortunately the aforementioned issues are what I’ve run in to.

So, if you like playing friendslop games (rv there yet, repo, peak, etc.) BR games (like apex legends/fortnite), or honestly just about any co-op game, my discord is Keemhll and I’d love to play with you! I’m super lighthearted and love talking, but can also be serious in times that call for it. I’m on N.A. CST and I have no preferences on what kind of person adds me, I just ask that it not be weird and that the vibes are good!

I'm a guy and I've tried to make other friends through these communities but it seems 90% of other men I message just ghost after a single conversation, or they put no effort to begin with, it doesn't even get to the point we get a session in

It's gotten to the point after so long trying, I don't even want to bother reaching out to fellow men anymore. The rest of the people seem to just be wanting to recruit for some large friend group discord and as someone that doesn't enjoy large groups, that's not for me

I had hoped that at least in this subreddit people would be a bit more united by the love of video games but it seems it follows the same tropes as the other communities.

I also feel very sorry for the ladies in these communities genuinely trying to reach out for some innocent and genuine friendships and getting bombarded by creeps, I feel for y'all. A lady will make a post and within an hour there's dozens of comments, I feel like despite the rules, so many men want to treat this shit as a dating site

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Why do you not respond holy fuck. Every. Single. Time it's the same shit.

See a post, write a message to engage. Nothing.

See a post, send a chat message. "Sounds good! When do you wanna..." Tell them. Nothing.

Make my own thread. Nothing.

I swear to christ allmighty in donut heaven you people just don't want friends. It can't be this absurd. Or bots. Or AI. Or something else.

...............................

You had that experience and search for someone that ACTUALLY wants to make a long lasting friendship? Then call SoundBoardEnjoyer900! There is nothing he loves more then make friends and don't be annoying with his soundboard!

Games! Survival! Coop! Adventures!

All that and more awaits you with this almost married 35 year old tax specialist from Germanyyyyyy!

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Edit: I see all the ghosts downvote. Probably because of all that guilt and shame

Edit2: Hello again! Just saw this in my lunchbreak and thank you all so much!!! This is a really great thing seeing people hit eachother up in the comments.

Also thank you for all those messages, I will respond over the next few days. Hopefully today but it's sooo busy at work.... 3. week of the month is the most annyoing for me. And afterwards I try to wind down, so we will see how I will manage my time.

28/EST/PC

Once again, I have been ghosted by a possible new friend. As with the others, we spend a week or more talking. Sometimes daily. Just to have them vanish as if they've never existed, just a made up imaginary friend. No reason, nothing.

I'm left here looking inward, because I am the only common factor here. What have I done to scare all these possible pals away?

I'm a stay at home mom, who loves gaming. As sad as it sounds, my longest running and truest friends are all online. To those who vanished; I hope life is leading you well. Take care. RIP to our chance at friendship.

UPDATE: Damn, didn't expect you all to understand my pain, but thanks, it means a lot that you all reached out. To avoid multiple reply messages, I'll add what I play here; R6S, Dead by Daylight, League, Phasmophobia, Dauntless, Genshin, Fortnite, FallGuys, Jackbox, Pummel Party, so on and so on. I have a huge Steam library, not to mention I'll just chit chat if that's the only option. Not the best at FPS or just shooters in general, but I try my best.

UPDATE2: Sending out Discord invites as I see screen names come along. Have met a few good people just since I posted earlier, so thank you all so much for that. If you haven't gotten a message from me, I will be sure to get to it. Had a WAY bigger turn out on this post than anticipated. Bit overwhelmed. Thank you kindly strangers.

MAJOR UPDATE: My post served its purpose much better than I ever expected. I knew I wasn't the only one wishing people weren't the way they are sometimes. Regardless of me being called whiney, which I am so not, I'm beyond happy with the outcome. Honestly, thank you so very much. I've already met a butt ton of people, all of which are pretty great characters. If you would like to play, DM your Discord or Stream if you rather that and I'll add you. We are a bad ass community, I'm proud to be a part of it. 🎃

Hello best friends. That's right, it's me. The ghost. I'm responsible for all the ghosting on this subreddit. You thought you were looking for a casual gaming buddy? Well, too bad. I'm looking for a perfect long-term best friend who will spend most of their free time with me. How dare you have other interests, hobbies, friends, taste in games or music or a job. We need to click. We need that spark fast and to be bright. I don't care whether it will fizzle out after a few messages due to my disappointment in you for not meeting my extraordinarily high expectations. I need you to put in all the effort into us. I mean, what else? Do you really expect me to go out of my way for a stranger? Pff, I'm like a few clicks away from freeing myself from any connection to you. I don't need to take any responsibility. What is this? A small village in 1872? I can be anonymous whenever I want. I'd rather not tell you I disagree with something you just said or put up boundaries. That's way too much conflict for someone I can make vanish in a few seconds.

Anyway, I'm severely lonely. Don't worry, it's not contagious or anything. But my misery sure is. I just need a best friend to talk to. Ideally that's a woman. Because I'm not going to disclose my romantic and sexual intentions to you right away. That would be silly. The dating market is already dire and don't even get me started on the stupid apps. I'd rather subtly find my gamer girlfriend here that I can play Overwatch with and marry. Oh but can you please send me pictures beforehand? Like, just in case. You could be ugly or not up to my spooky standards. Just being polite. After all women are clearly the best gamers out there. This subreddit clearly proves "F" is the way to go if you want a true gamer. "M" stands for mediocre and should be aggressively ignored.

I hope you can just be spontaneous whenever I need you, okay? I won't tell you when that is though. I'd prefer if you constantly check up on me, but not too much, that would be annoying. I'm sure we can be best friends immediately. Like in school when we were children, remember? That's how I made all my friends back then! I mean, let's maybe forget that our personalities literally consisted of liking Minecraft, lizards and hating the math teacher. And let's also completely negate that we saw each other every single day and that our shared challenges and time spent together inevitably forged us into friends. NO! None of that PLEASE. I don't want a stupid journey. I don't care that we're complex adults with each their own individual story. I NEED that spark NOW. If we don't spark within a couple of messages, I'm basically wasting my time on you? I don't want to take you seriously, consider your way of communication or your availability. What? Omg XD are you for real? Scheduling dates? What am I, at the doctor? Best friends can just feel when they need each other lmao I am still pretty lonely though. Not sure why, I'm really funny and likable.

Anyway, can't wait for all the deep talks we'll have together!! p.s.: I exclusively play on the SEGA Dreamcast.

(I'm sorry, please don't take this too seriously, it's satire and I'm tired)

Edit: I didn't expect people to actually DM me offering to game. That's incredibly sweet <3 However, I want to emphasize again that this is all satire to represent some of my frustrations on this subreddit. But here's a post where I'm not a snarky butthole in case you're interested.

Looking for social players in their 50’s and 60’s. I am usually available around 5 -6 pm CST every day. I play on a PS4. Screen name avidevader.

Obligatory this isn't for everyone, as I've met 1-2 really nice people here before.

I can't be the only person here who made a thread with a good 10+ people responding asking to play either publicly or in private, we exchange Discord info and the moment I ask when are they available/what server they are on they never reply. Why? What did you hope to gain if you posted you're looking for group only to never actually play?

Or, people who tell me they are busy while I see them constantly online, playing with different full parties. Why did you want to add me if you already have dozens of people to play with nonstop?

I'm tired of never getting responses after the first initial contact and getting ghosted by the 2nd sentence right after hello. It's so exhausting being the only one who tries. If you're just adding people for fun please stop, I don't like adding 10+ people a week only to play with 1 of them.

Or else your post will be removed in line with the subreddit rules.

Hi 28F, here. I just gotta ask, but do any of you actually have any luck finding somebody genuine here?
I tried DMing multiple people again and again, almost never getting a reply back or getting ghosted after a day or two, with me initiating all the conversations. Or once they find out I am married and not interested in anything other than a gaming friendship.
Is there really no way of finding normal people that just want to play some games and get to know one another without getting ghosted?

Edit: Omg guys I just wanted to let you all know, this is very overwhelming I have over 200+ dm’s which is just crazy. I try not to ignore anyone, but it may take me some days to read and reply to everyone.