I had started a new position at a new centre. I was there about 3 weeks and the lady who was my partner in the room hit a 12 month old across the face . In front of me. I asked her if she just hit the baby. She said yes and that it was the baby's fault because she pinched her.

I knew the owner was still in the office, so I had a staff in the next room call her to my room. I was holding the baby my partner hit. She was scared and crying. Meanwhile my partner was pleading with me not to tell anyone.

When the owner arrived in the room my partner started crying. The owner asked what happened. I explained that the baby was on one side of puzzle table and my partner called for the baby to come to the other side. The baby obviously needed help. Which is what I thought my partner was about to do. No instead she hit her hard across the face. Like WTF!!!

The owner then asked me to write up an incident report and hand it in to her. She then informed me that I cant tell anyone of this and she will take care of it. I did this and had the Director sign the incident report. I then made a copy of it for myself. I learned the hard way to always have a signed copy for myself, as this I have witnessed before at a different centre.

One week passed and I still was working with the same partner. I was quite upset because I felt I needed to keep my eyes on my partner more then ever. I mean she even told the owner that she hit the baby but acted like it was okay because the baby pinched her. I then went to the owner and asked what was going on. She told me they were getting rid of her but they needed to hire a new staff first. And she said there are no child care workers out there right now looking for jobs. Which I know is a load of crap.

After two weeks of working with this child abusive partner I approached the owner and told her I was uncomfortable working with her. I was told I could trade rooms with one of the other staff and work in the preschool room. I told her absolutely not. I was not leaving my babies alone with her. I knew after this they weren't taking this seriously.

So that night I phoned CPS, Licensing and finally the police. The police took my statement and I answered everything as best as I could remember. I told the officer that I have a copy of the incident report that the director signed and there was a copy in the office that both the director and owner read when I first reported it.

Next morning an officer arrived bright and early and headed straight to the office. The owner was very surprised. The door to the office was closed for a good hour. When the officer was finished talking with the owner she came to tell me that the owner denies the incident happened and I was making a false report. And that no incident report was filled out. I then handed over my copy with both mine and the directors signature. The officer gave me a big smile and told me she will deal with the owner now and contact me for further information in the future.

Has anyone else been through this process. Do you think it might go to court. Will my partner lose her job or be charged?

Sorry for the long post I just wanted everything explained as factually as possible.

Thanks for any help😊

Update

Hello everyone. Thank you so very much for encouraging words of support and love. It means a lot and has given me much needed strength. I know I have done the right thing and much of the guilt of listening to my boss and not reporting it for 2 weeks has lifted.

So I was really preparing myself mentally to go in to work on Monday morning. Not knowing what to expect. But it was all good. My coworker was suspended while an investigation is going to take place. Which I believe she won't be coming back, she admitted she hit the baby to the owner, director and myself. So I really hope that either of them back me up and admit what she did.

The parents of the baby who was hit were notified about what happened, and they also received a copy of the report. I never got to talk to them in person but they had all of their babies items we keep at the centre packed up and they were gone when i started in my room at 9 am.

An email was also sent out to each of the families explaining that a child may have been physically assaulted by one of the staff. An investigation has been started and the staff member accused has been suspended. They also go on about how much they love, care and protect all children in their centre. I couldn't believe what I was reading. They don't care about any child or they would have reported it as soon as it happened. But the truth will hopefully all come out.

I also realized that I couldn't stay working at this centre when the owner lied and said I made a false report. Thank God I had a copy of the incident report signed by the director. About 15 minutes into my shift I realized that I just can't work for these people anymore. I was not going to punish myself mentally or help them make a penny more for their business. I packed up my things and as if I was in a dream I walked into the office. I told the owner to basically go to hell and I hope she loses her centre's. She owns 4!

I am now in search of my new work adventure. I have looked into being a nanny. I believe that type of environment would be a nice change. I will post an update after I talk with the police to let everyone know what happens to these horrible human beings. Again thank you all for listening 💜

Parent here. Sorry to crash the sub. It gets recommended to me a lot and I just have to share this.

My 2 year old goes to an amazing dayschool with fabulous teachers. One of her teachers is on maternity leave, so they pulled a teacher from a younger room to cover while she’s out.

Once her new teacher started, she started coming home with these elaborate hair styles. You know the ones that use 6 million tiny rubber bands. Very cute and very beyond what I could ever accomplish. I’ve been impressed.

Today when I picked her up, I said “oh look how cute your hair is! Did Ms. Anna do that?” And her regular teacher let me in on Ms Anna’s secret. It’s how Ms Anna gets them to nap!

My 2 year old has never been a great napper at school. I think there’s just too much going on for her. She naps fine at home but not at school. Apparently Ms Anna does the “not great nappers’” hair during nap time to get them to eventually fall asleep. Today my daughter apparently fell asleep sitting up while Ms Anna did her hair.

Anyway, I’m constantly amazed at the magic toddler teachers can work. I would have never thought of this!

EDIT: Woah I did not expect this to get so much attention! I’m glad I posted it here because I love all the sweet stories! I’m a high school teacher and I’m constantly amazed at my daughter’s infant and toddler teachers and the magic they work. I’m sorry it started off sounding like a complaint! I wish I could say I can’t believe a parent would ever complain about a teacher doing their child’s hair (so long as the child enjoyed it also) but as a teacher I know there have been crazier complaints. To the early childhood educators here, know that you are appreciated and your magic is noticed!

I learned years ago in my high school child development class to always check a baby’s fingers and toes for hair tourniquets—and for boys, even their privates—if they’re crying for no obvious reason. For some reason that little tip always stuck with me. So anytime I’ve cared for a baby who wouldn’t stop crying, and all their basic needs were met, I’ve made it a habit to check for hair tourniquets.

My coworkers have asked me what I’m doing when I randomly take a baby’s sock off to check their toes, like it’s something odd, but today it finally proved useful. A 5-month-old in my class just wouldn’t settle—he was fed, changed, and didn’t want to sleep. I took his sock off, and sure enough, there was a strand of hair tightly wrapped around his toe. It was swollen and red.

We were able to remove it with tweezers, called his mom right away, and she brought him to the pediatrician to get his toe checked out. Thankfully, he’s back to himself now but I’m so glad I had that little habit drilled into me, because who knows how long he could’ve gone without anyone noticing it!

Yesterday we received a mass message from our kindergarten staff that the class backpack with emergency meds like epipens and inhalers fell off the command hook after hours and “made its way into the trash can”. They apologized for the inconvenience and asked parents to send in replacements. My son has a peanut allergy so this isn’t just an “inconvenience” (although it will cost us $200 to replace). I replied that I understand mistakes happen, but a command hook doesn’t sound like the best storage option. They replied that it had been that way for years.

I just have so many questions. How long was it missing before someone realized? What would have happened if my son had an accidental ingestion? Who sees a backpack on the floor and thinks it’s trash? Is this a normal way of keeping emergency meds secured? Can I get my $200 reimbursed? (That one is more rhetorical.)

Our preschool and daycare had one of those secure wall box things for this purpose. No chance of it falling and being thrown out.

Thanks for reading. I guess I’d just like to see if this is standard procedure?

Edit: these responses are making me feel very validated in my concern, I will be emailing the principal and will update you all. THANK YOU!

Sending your unvaccinated children around other children is selfish and dangerous.

once our pipes burst and my nursery was filled with the smell of sewages. i used my hijab to cover my nose and make it easier to deal with and one of my toddlers pointed at me and said ‘teacher has turned into a ghost!’ months later my toddlers still love to hide under my hijab and be ghosts for themselves. whenever i pull out the ghost move they run around and hide from the ghost loll

i’ve had parents apologise for their children being ‘racist’ (because of course they go home and say that i’m secretly a ghost) but they don’t get how adorable it is to me. i love working with kids, they’re so so innocent 😭

i did not think this post would blow up like it did wow, thanks everyone!

We just moved and my 16 month old daughter started at a new daycare on Wednesday last week. They put her in the infant room even though we wanted her with the toddlers.

On her first day, we brought her water cup and sippy bottle and told them which was which. When we picked her up, they told me only to bring the bottle because they only gave her milk. I spoke to the director and she assured me that they would give her water, but every time I pick her up they’ve only used one cup and there’s milk in it. She comes home and chugs water like she’s been in the desert, and now she’s constipated. In 1 week I’ve spoken to them 3 times about giving her water. Is it normal for daycares to give kids unlimited milk all day? (Our pediatrician wants us to limit how much milk she’s drinking to 24oz a day).

They also had her strapped into a bouncy chair yesterday when I picked her up. She’s smaller, so she probably is still in the weight range but that doesn’t seem safe for a child that’s walking already.

Another concern is that the center’s phone is a cell phone that stays with the director, but she never seems to be there. What if there’s an emergency? No one has time to be playing phone tag when you’re dealing with your kids well-being.

We’re already looking for somewhere else, but I’m wondering if I need to pull her now or wait it out because I already paid for next week. Would it be wrong to ask for next week’s tuition back?

Update: I spoke with the director and she was pretty defensive. Her mother is in charge of food and she says she has short term memory problems (which omg what if a kid has food allergies!) We did sign some paperwork about usda free lunch so I’m assuming they’re required to offer milk but I still want them to offer water more.

She also said the bouncy chair is only for the last 30 mins while they only have a couple of teachers during pickup. They are going to move her to the toddler class tomorrow, which is apparently full of kids from 14-20 months so I’m not sure why we were with the babies to begin with. I’m touring a couple of places tomorrow, one of which just opened so it wasn’t there when I was initially searching.

Update #2: We decided to keep her home today and this morning I toured a new facility that just opened, and I loved it. I was able to get my money back from the first place so we could secure a spot at a better place. I’m looking at this as a blessing in disguise because my baby is ok. Lots of parents aren’t as lucky to see the signs before something bad happens.

Update #3: Unfortunately we just learned that the daycare had an inspection in January that they failed miserably and they were cited for all the things we’ve had issues with, as well as not background checking their workers. We found this daycare through Georgia’s Quality Rated Childcare program, but the report wasn’t online when we were choosing daycares in April. We also found out they’ve changed names a couple of times, and none of the names have more than a couple of Google reviews, all positive. It makes me absolutely sick that we sent her there, and that the state withheld the information we needed to make an informed decision. Thank goodness nothing terrible happened.

We start at her new facility tomorrow. It is brand new so we’ll be watching extra closely. Once we know she’s safe there, I’ll be calling licensing on the first place tomorrow afternoon.

My 2.5 year old son started in a new daycare just over a month ago. As I was doing laundry tonight, I saw that his swimsuit is getting ruined- it's all pilled in the butt (was he butt scooting on a tree? Sliding down a rock like a waterslide?), stains everywhere. Most days when I pick him up, his clothes are covered in stains, pants and shirts and even socks, most of which I can't get out. Dirt, berry juice, turmeric or something, who even knows. This kid hardly has any presentable clothes left. Not to mention the mosquito bites, knee scrapes, stick scrapes, etc. on his body. And it's fabulous. I'm thrilled! He is out having the time of his life, throwing rocks in the river, climbing trees, hugging goats, playing in a fairy garden, hiking to waterfalls, cooking practically gourmet and farm-raised food (even today having rabbit for lunch... The same rabbits he was helping to feed last week).

I hate that my child has to go to daycare, I want nothing more than to be a stay at home mom, but alas, I have to work, spending all day with other people's kids. But today as I reflect on my child's ruined clothes, I'm glad he has this opportunity, and thankful for his teachers who unashamedly let kids get (VERY) messy and have risky play (I am guilty of protecting my baby too much from the little scrapes of life), who spend all day outside making magical memories.

I know some parents complain about these types of things. But thank you to the teachers who let kids get messy, who go outside even when it's hot or cold or rainy, and who love on kids while giving them a fun childhood.

First time reporter. There’s a child in my class whose parent is really irresponsible. They ignore medical needs (probably asthmatic and struggling to breathe, but won’t go to doctor despite our efforts to do so), have been physically rough with the child in public places (I’ve witnessed and heard from other parents that they’ve seen it happen), is known to tell the kids to shut the fuck up and call them names, sometimes ride in the car without seatbelts/car seats, and refuses to meet and discuss this child’s significant behavioral problems and what we can do to support them. They think they’re fine and are refusing EI for support in various areas. The child isn’t meeting milestones, isn’t getting the attention or support they need, and I’ve been watching things get worse over a long period of time. I like this parent and I like this child and now I feel guilty for doing it. I know it was the right thing to do because I can tell things aren’t improving, but I have this sick feeling all the time. Anyone else ever have this happen? Is it normal to feel bad about making a report?

I’ve always hated the “awww, is this your girlfriend/boyfriend” thing with young kids as it’s just weird. Especially with my age group (young toddlers). To me, it’s just taking sweet, friendly things kids do and turn it into something else. Totally get for some it’s not that deep, just a pet peeve of mine. Though one I just kind of let roll off my back.

This year, I have a kiddo who’s mom has been making comments about him “flirting” with the girls, saying “I’m the only woman in your life”. It’d be one thing if she said it once, but she can’t even be like “aw, I’m so glad he’s making friends!”. He’s almost 18 months. He blows kisses to everyone, gives hugs, is very smiley. We call him “the mayor” because he’s always greeting everyone. He’s just a sweet kid. She never says it if he does it to any of the boys or us teachers. Just the girls.

Today, I don’t know if it was intentional, but he pulled out his friend’s (little girl) chair at lunch. It was very sweet. I told his dad and he’s like “we better not tell mom! She doesn’t like you doing these things!”

Maybe I’m too sensitive. Maybe I should find it funny…but he’s 18 months. The fact that we can’t share these tidbits without the comments is just eye roll inducing. They’re very nice people outside of this, just tired of hearing it.

So on Saturday I made this post where I vented about a preschooler who cut my hair and his mother who accused me of bullying for taking his scissors away from him and demanded I apologize for it.

I told my director I would not be apologizing to the child for a reasonable consequence. That’s when she told me his mother said he told her the hair cutting was an accident and I snatched the scissors away from him and his teacher made him sit in timeout for the remainder of the crafts time. I told her that was absolutely not true and asked if she watched the camera footage to confirm it. She said no and pulled it up. We saw the video of him giggling with another child and sneakily reaching over to cut my hair. You could also see/hear him laughing hysterically after I turned around and realized what he’d done. I said “are you serious” and then followed up with “you’re done with those. Give me the scissors” in a serious tone and he stops laughing and I repeat myself and he hands them to me. You can also see his teacher scold him and give him a coloring sheet and crayons/colored pencils to work on instead.

My director said we’d still have the conference just to clear the air. It was me, the boys mother, his teacher, and our director. She went on a whole spiel about how he’s always been singled out and targeted and she wanted to pull him from our center but she couldn’t afford any of the others around here. She actually started crying. When I explained the situation to her, she insisted he told her it was an accident and her first instinct is to trust her baby. Then our director showed her the footage and she got very embarrassed and uncomfortable.

She was silent so I took it as an opportunity to educate her. Our hair holds a lot of cultural significance in my tribe. There are very specific circumstances when our hair can be cut and it is not taken lightly. It must be a person with matriarchal significance (preferably your mother or your mothers mother), with clear intentions. My mother trims a couple of centimeters off my hair once a month on the full moon and that is the only person who ever touches my hair. I am also the only person who cuts and braids my both of my daughters’ hair. The child cut 17 inches of my hair so I ended up having my mom cut all of my hair to that shoulder length and I cried for hours in her arms that night. I am already so disconnected from my culture as it was heavily erased in American history and continues to die out. Cutting off my hair felt like severing ties with my ancestors. I explained all of this to her and I got a bit emotional while doing so.

She was slightly apologetic. She said sorry to the director for misunderstanding the situation and apologized to his teacher and the director for wasting their time. She didn’t say anything to me. Later that day his dad came to pick him up. He brought him to me and had him apologize for cutting my hair and give me a hand made card and some flowers. It was a sweet gesture and ultimately I’m not too mad at him. I’ve known him since he was a baby and underneath all the problematic behaviors he’s a sweet kid.

That’s all. I didn’t lose my job today and I wasn’t forced to apologize to anyone. A win I guess. Thanks for all the advice and reassurance that I did nothing wrong!

I was outside on the playground with the kids and a parent came to drop off their kid. The kid was eating a bag of chips on the way in. Outside food isn’t allowed on the playground. I tell parent this and they’re having a hard time taking the chips from the toddler. They say they’ll just take kid inside. Parent picks their kid up and go into the classroom. I think nothing of it and stay outside with the rest of the class.

Next thing I know, a coworker comes to me saying the toddler was by themselves in the classroom. Coworker reports it to admin and I was suspended without pay until further notice. I genuinely thought parent was inside the classroom with their kid. Admin’s asking, “why didn’t you help them with the transition? why didn’t you check up on them?” I thought parent had it covered, that parent was inside the classroom with their kid, letting them finish their chips. “You saw the child, you engaged with the child, you signed the child in on the clip board. The child was technically in your care when she was left unsupervised. We are going to have to suspend you without pay until further notice.”

I’ve been at the school for almost 5 years now and this is my first major infraction. Got a call from HR this morning and I have been terminated.

I downloaded it from procare and i could not stop laughing. How do the daycare teachers do that??

We have to do so much for her to nap sometimes (she still gets very grumpy without naps), meanwhile 9 of those little terrorists laid down to nap by just being asked nicely.

The teachers have lullaby music playing on low, the kids have their nap blankets, and she said "ok time to sleep" and they start laying down on the. matt. My 2 year old even started sucking her thumb, which means shes going to sleep for reals.

Mine you, they're ALL 2-3 years old. In the peak of their defiance era. What kind of witchcraft did I just watch 🤣

UPDATE: My daughter is now being rushed to the ICU.

There are updates at the bottom but THIS IS NOT ABOUT COMMON COLDS. This is about parents that know their kid has a fever or sick with RSV, COVID etc.

My daughter is an ex-25 weeker, currently 20 months old. She was in the NICU for 6 months and came home with a gtube and oxygen - she *had severe chronic lung disease. She finally got off oxygen in May and was ready to go out into the world.

We just started Daycare at the end of August but she has only physically been there for about 9 days -- she has been out sick the rest of the time. BTW, I still have to pay even thought she isn't there.

I just had to rush her via ambulance to Boston Children's because her 02 sats plummeted so fast. The daycare teacher had warned me last week she thought a kid in her class had RSV, but the parents kept saying he was fine and most likely giving him Tylenol to hide the fever.

Screw those parents. We are now looking at days in the hospital and putting her back on oxygen and pumped full of steroids to keep her airways clear. We have worked so hard to keep her lungs healthy, but not it's like 1 step forward and 10 steps back.

I am just so angry, I am shaking.

Maybe the parents of the sick kids should make other accommodations. Maybe everyone gets sick at daycare because they send them in sick. Break the cycle.

Update: People are right, it is such a societal problem where some parents are forced to bring in sick kids so they dont lose their job. My anger has mostly shifted away from parents.

Another update: OK so I should be more clear. Runny nose, simple cold - it's the cost of doing business, I get that. Her pulmonologist had cleared her for daycare and we started her in August in the hopes we could test out her stress response to being sick. Despite how miserable she was, she did amazing and we were so relieved. HOWEVER, I did not know that parents sent their kids to daycare with fevers or obvious illnesses like RSV and COVID. I am not attacking people for the sniffles.

For those saying seek smaller daycares, we tried to get into a home daycare but no one would take her because she has a gtube. While it is illegal to discriminate, first they have openings then when I mention the gtube (which they would not have to use while she is there) suddenly they are full up.

For nanny and babysitter, someone mentioned have a nanny-like timeshare haha. That was an amazing suggestion and I am 100% going to look into it. I want Bridget to socialize safely and this seems like a great option that I never even thought of.

And for those saying "too bad," well... you wouldn't be saying that if it was your kid. It kind of sucks getting those types of comments as I am sitting next to my daughter in the hospital on oxygen, hooked up to monitors and IVs, as she struggles to breathe. So, have a heart maybe?

LAST UPDATE: So I am getting alot of comments that didn't read through the whole post. I am not hating on parents sending their kids in with the sniffles. Again, I am talking about parents who send their kid in when they are obviously very sick. Kids have snotty noses, I expected that. What I didn't expect is that people send kids to daycare knowing they are really sick. And from reading through all the comments, daycare workers are PISSED. Not one daycare work is dissecting RSV symptoms trying to rationalize that it appears as a cold. Your kid has the sniffles and unknowingly has RSV? Fine, how were you supposed to know. But if your kid has a fever and is hacking up a lung -- and you know -- and you send them in anyways, YTA. Stop normalizing this.

I dont think I can keep responding to comments that didnt read through the post, its exhausting, and I am on 48 hours without sleep. To those who had kind words, thank you for the support and I appreciate the knowledgeable and helpful advice. For those that didn't, I will work on winning the lottery so I can stay at home full time - I'm actually happy you do no have to experience life with a medically complex child becuase its pretty lonely out here and not many people care.

I think that is it - my baby is getting worse and I really have to focus on her getting better.

So I had to call CPS on a child today. During naptime she asked me to touch her privates and it was a weird interaction. She's made other weird comments about how her "butt is bleeding" and she hides in the bathroom if she has to do something she doesn't like. I went to my director about it and she told me I needed to call CPS. Well, not that I needed to but that it was very encouraged.

I didn't think anything of it at the time. My brain was just like "oh nothing will happen because nothing is happening at home obviously she's just being weird" but now my mom is drawing my attention to how serious it is and I'm freaking out. Her and her family live in a homeless shelter and I'm so scared she's going to get taken from her family. Idk how to process these feelings, do any of you have advice?

Edit: thanks everyone for all the kind words and advice. I just want to add that again I DID call CPS and they said they're going to screen it or look into it however they phrase it. This was just asking for advice on the guilty feelings after.

Hi, back again. Yours truly. Previous posts on my profile but they aren't really necessary.

My son is four and has PTSD relative to men specifically. He was making very little progress in therapy despite referrals and different techniques. About two months ago his female aid was switched for a male one which was the manner of my previous posts.

It was a whole situation. Sucked ass. Whatever. He was shutting down daily and regressing massively just from being with a man so we had a meeting with the school - they couldn't change his aid, but they could pair him and his aid up with another student and her female aid.

That was working well, but as I suspected, my son basically refused to acknowledge his aid and went to the woman instead. I felt really bad for her - she was basically an only aid for two kids who required 1-1.

During this time period my son made a huge breakthrough. I have one male friend who comes over regularly and is our safe guy for my son's therapy - son jumped off my lap, took his book over to my friend, asked him to read it. He sat on the other side of the room and hid but he interacted with him which he has never done before.

Since then my son has been taking small steps randomly with him. It was going great and I was really excited for him.

Then my sons female aid was out of class with her student.

Just as before - he wet himself and shut down (supposedly, I think he was probably just quiet). Until his aid took him into the bathroom to get changed.

I guess with the newfound confidence in regards to men he decided he'd try defending himself.

When his aid started undressing him my son fucking lost it. Screaming, thrashing, kicking, biting - he effectively battled his aid and escaped the bathroom half naked.

His class teacher had to abandon thirty four & five year olds to go rescue my wee naked child. He, thankfully, isn't too shaken up all considered, but now the school want him to be moved into an isolated "behaviour room". Which is full of male teachers.

He fucked up his aid pretty bad, I think. But I told them. I fucking warned them. He doesn't like men. He's not going to just lay docile and allow a man to change him forever.

His therapist is recommending switching schools. Maybe a little unethical, but his previous aid (the original, amazing one) added me on Facebook and after seeing my ranty post told me which school she's working at now. She left after being switched to a student she couldn't cope with.

I am just so tired. I so badly don't want to switch him but at this point I feel like I have no choice. I don't even really know why I'm posting. Ugh.

…has a BM accident every day, they aren’t potty trained. I’m sorry. It doesn’t matter if they are for pee.

You’re not a bad parent, they aren’t a bad kid, and I know the pull-up bandaid has to ripped off at some point. But your child pooping in their underwear daily and going about their business, and still needing adult help to clean up and change, may not be ready for underwear just yet.

There are so many 3 and 4 year olds at my school who just poop their pants and change clothes all day long. They don’t say anything, the teachers just eventually smell it, and even then they’ll hysterically deny it. Their parents take home bags of horrific clothing every day, and it’s just a regular thing. Pinkeye is rampant.

She is really loving to my toddler and an amazing teacher. She called today to lmk my toddler was not left in the best condition. This is the first time I have trusted him to get her ready for daycare and with a solid two overnights. Usually I pick her up for bedtime and drop her off in the morning.

Well, her teacher called and informed me that she was left in a diaper from last night (dropped off at 10am, mind you; he sleeps at 6pmish, wakes up at 5am). She also informed me he did not drop off clean clothes for her; he left the dirty clothes they put in a plastic bag from yesterday in her daycare bag. And the clothes he did put in was 12 months... She's in 2-3T. Also dropped her without shoes, and the daycare requires she have shoes. She also mentioned to me that she did her hair, and to not worry about that, so I imagine he also didn't do her hair or brush her teeth. She sent me a picture of the clothes she came in; really dirty and caked in food. She also had a significant diaper rash, which I'm going to have to go get prescription cream for now.

I had to leave work, get into trouble, and drop off clothes & shoes.

I'm extremely furious with my ex and want to have a serious talk with him (when I calm down, because I would not be super nice right now). I'm so mad I can't even think logically, so I don't even know what I want to say to him yet.

He is going through a rough time right now, but that isn't an excuse and he's either going to have to shape up, or I might have to revisit court.

Now, 99% chance that he will call and complain about the teacher if I do talk to him. Is there a chance she will get fired?

He does see our daughter, but I am by far the primary parent. I really love this teacher, so I don't want to get her fired. Not sure how to approach this situation.

Edit:

She mentioned to me that she logged that my ex dropped her off, after she reassured me about the hair thing. So I kind of feel like this genius (my ex) got CPS called. I have nothing to worry about or hide, but it's now probably going to be a mess of paperwork and proof that we aren't both neglectful. As if I wasn't already stressed enough.

Fyi, I'm not mad at all at the teacher. She did the right thing either way. Just a shitty situation to be in.

We recently got a new student (28 months) and after we noticed that she doesn't respond to her name the parents told us that they call her by a different name at home. We asked what that name is and they refuse to tell us, insisting that we use the English name they came up with. The child's behavior is extremely difficult to manage and she obviously isn't aware of when we're trying to get her attention. Advice?

Last week During our first afternoon snack one of our three year olds was eating a little package of nuts, pepitas, and cranberries. This was a snack from home and a snack that he’d eaten before. Partway through snack he said that his food was spicy. We got a lot of kids to say that their food is spicy, and since I have my own severe allergy (to a fruit) I’m aware that food allergies can manifest this way, and I always taste the food to see if there’s any type of seasoning. Most of the time there is and I can see how a kid palate would see it as spicy, but this time it was just a plain, unseasoned pistachio. I took note of that, and shortly after noticed his lips were red and he as getting tiny dots on his face. I flagged it to a coworker and within a few minutes this kid was fully broken out in hives. We called emergency contacts and 911. He was fine, it only manifested as hives, but with no history of allergies and no medication, I was scared that it would progress to anaphylaxis. The other kids were thrilled to see a fire truck and ambulance. I also want to point out that the medics and firefighters were amazing, one of them gave stickers out to everyone.

The following day I noticed a red mark on a different child’s face, a red swollen area right under his eye. It almost looks like he had gotten hit, but no one had seen anything and the child said nothing happened. It got a little bit puffier as time went on, and we messaged mom to let her know about it. according to mom, later that evening that child had some type of systemic body wide breakout of a rash, and they are suspecting some type of allergy there too. So we have two kids who are currently going through allergy testing.

I wanted to share this because even these days there still isn’t always a lot of understanding about allergies, and a child having an allergic reaction in care is a terrifying moment. Early signs of allergies can manifest as a food tasting spicy or sharp, so if a child is complaining about their food being spicy, if you able to then try some of the food yourself to see if it is seasoned. If a child starts to have an allergic reaction and they have no history, don’t hesitate to call 911. If you don’t know where all your centers children’s contacted medical information is, go in today and ask. And if you do have a first responder situation at your center, make sure you take care of yourself after. Also check in with your supervisors about how to respond to parents when something happens. This was during one of our pick up times, so a lot of the parents picking up were really concerned. And allergies can show up randomly and out of nowhere, so just because a child doesn’t have any recorded allergies doesn’t mean that they don’t have any allergies. You should always be keeping an eye out for reactions. Allergic reactions can happen even hours after exposure to the allergens. And anaphylaxis can happen at any time during an allergic reaction, just because it isn’t happening initially doesn’t mean that that can’t change. Even what appears like a mild allergic reaction can turn severe in a matter of seconds.

Even though this was last week and the first child has since returned to care and is doing perfectly well, I still feel a lingering sense of guilt, because even though parents provided the snap, I was the one who handed it to him. I’m just really glad that I noticed the allergic reactions in both situations very quickly.

I despise when parents bring it kids with snotty faces, eye boogers, and food left on their face from dinner the night before. Get your kid ready for the day! They deserve to feel clean and handsome/pretty for the day just like you. These kids are obviously uncomfortable.

And if you refuse to brush their hair CUT IT. Why should a three year old girl have matted hair down to her knees, and you come in with your hair done, new nails, and full face of makeup. I can’t imagine what it would feel like if I came to work everyday feeling disgusting. These kids are people too.

I understand if it is a hard morning and the kids are not cooperating. But I have families that have never done their kids hair in the months they’ve been at my facility. So then it becomes my job to clean these kids faces, and give them a hairstyle that makes them feel good. I don’t mind doing it I just feel for the kids that don’t get that care and attention at home.

Edit: I feel like I need to state that I am absolutely NOT judging struggling parents. I live in a very low income rural area, and a lot of the children I care for are being neglected. I am specifically talking about parents that have not once brushed their kids hair in the months s child has been at my facility, and I do not think that is okay.

i honestly should have walked out way sooner. i arrive at the center and park near the playground. i look and i notice i only see one teacher with what looks like 6-8 1 year olds. this is out of ratio in my state but i told myself maybe the other teacher was using the restroom or crouched low on the playground where i couldn’t see her. i buzz the doorbell and no one answers. buzz it again 5 minutes later. call the center, no answer. i go to ask the teacher on the playground to help me somehow by calling inside. i get out “hey i’m here for an interview-“ and she cuts me off by telling me her door code. she told a stranger the code to get into the building with all the kids. i was mind blown but i told myself maybe she knew i was coming and was told it was okay. i get inside and go into the directors office. we talk for a few minutes about my past experience when the same teacher i saw outside pops in. “____ still isn’t here and i’m not in ratio. i need someone to come in here” the director tries to quietly say “i will be in there when i’m done”. at that point i pushed back my chair and as nicely as i could said “i’m sorry, i don’t think this is going to be the environment for me. i was out of ratio a lot at my old jobs and i don’t want to go through that again. thank you for your time.” maybe i was being dramatic, but in addition to the entire center looking extremely dirty, it was just too many red flags for me.🫠 ETA- obviously i called licensing. i didn’t add it in the post because i figured it would have been assumed and i was trying to keep the post somewhat readable. trust me when i say im not afraid to call licensing on any center, regardless if im working there or not.

Yes you read that title correctly! A 4 year old non-verbal disabled child in my care had BED BUGS in her pull up! It was also clear that the pull-up hadn’t been changed in at least 12 hours. It was LOADED with brown urine and filth. Yes DCFS was contacted about this and several other neglect/hygiene issues yesterday but I am so upset about the whole situation and I feel I didn’t do enough. It felt like DCFS was almost annoyed with the call! This family has been reported multiple times in the last few years, and the guardian (grandfather) of this precious child was so angry that he had to come pick her up from school right after drop off. He said he’s known about the bed bugs for MONTHS and they’re “really no big deal”. What in the actual f@&k?!?!?!

I barely slept last night and I’m about to go into work for the day. Our entire classroom had to be fumigated last night and we cannot use it. We only have access to the sensory room since we are technically part of a public elementary school. There is nowhere else to take these kids until next week. Yesterday was an absolute nightmare and I am DREADING going in today.

The superintendent of the school district told us NOT to tell any of the other parents, kids, staff, or anyone else about the situation, aside from the police and DCFS. They don’t even have a specific protocol for bed bugs at the school. But my main concern is for these two children being eaten alive by parasites. Is there any way to follow up and find out what happens with the report? I’ve never had to do this before and I am so worried about this baby and her older sibling. The thought of those bugs crawling all over them is so disturbing! Rant over. Thank you for reading and sorry for the visual!

UPDATE/ETA: I’ve been seeing comments telling me to report this to the police and DCFS. This was done as soon as the child was picked up and sent home after we spoke with grandpa about the bed bugs. I document everything with these kids and I took pics of the diaper itself with close ups of the bugs for evidence. I also documented each and every correspondence with the grandparents regarding resources for themselves and these kids. They have not taken advantage of any of these (FREE) opportunities so far.

ETA2: I want to thank everyone for the support, advice, kindness and encouragement. This community is absolutely wonderful and I appreciate you all!

‼️UPDATE‼️ I just found out that both children have been temporarily removed under an emergency order and placed with an extended family member. Both are also currently in the process of receiving a LOT of medical care. The 4 year old will be back at school next Thursday if all goes well!

I understand that parents have to work. We live in a country that makes existing, let alone existing with children, impossible. But I hate watching these toddlers suffer. They’re so young but have to be in daycare for such long days.

By the time they finish nap, these kids are physically and emotionally exhausted. I watched one of my kids quite literally cry, then fall asleep on the table after her snack was done. You comfort them and try to soothe as best you can, but all the teacher love in the world can’t replace being comfortable at home with a parent. I don’t know my heart just kinda breaks a little.

Edit: reminder that this is a vent post. Wasn’t really looking to be scolded and told I need to find a new career. I love what I do and with a salary this low, I have to. It’s definitely not the money keeping me in ece!

We had 3 under 3, now they are freshly 1, 2, and 4. They all go to daycare since they were 6-8 weeks old. We LOVE LOVE our daycare. For so many reasons.

They have super low turnover but still, over the years sometimes you get new teachers in different rooms. The kids change rooms every 6 months so they're well-grouped by age. Nonetheless, almost every single day, the little kids come home smelling like their teachers' perfume.

This just makes me so, so happy. It means my sweet babies are getting so many cuddles throughout the day that they come home with their teachers' delightful perfume or body lotion in their hair and clothes. And these teachers are of course busy with many kids and all their many responsibilities. But they're still finding time to give each kid love.

My heart is overwhelmed every time I smell this. It just makes me so grateful for all of the wonderful childcare professionals out there.

Thank you all.

Edit to add: it's for sure not always perfume specifically. In fact I have not once in my four years there walked past someone and gotten an active whiff of anything and I have a pretty sensitive nose. It could be so many things - perfume, body lotion, shampoo, detergent, hair oil, good chi, you name it. All I know is it makes me so happy ❤️