So she sprung that one on me after I made her a sandwich. It's not like I wanted to be her personal slave, but the neighbors have me shit for letting her share the dog's food. I thought sharing was a good value. Fuck me, right?

Anyway, I was blindsided when she threw that one on me and I don't feel the same way. It's a big step and I'm not ready for that kind of commitment. And who the fuck is mommy, anyway? She knows damn well my name is Karen!

There are too many red flags and I think I need to break it off. Any suggestions?

I threw a baseball in a tree, but he's too much of a nerd to go up there and get stuck.

They say this Brandon kid's gonna have a hell of an 8th. I at least need to make an appearance.

UPDATE: Brandon's mom says the invitation was for my son. The assholes never bothered to write "Jr." when writing his name.

How do I retaliate against Brandon's mom?

Hi my son is 7 and still a virgin, he's in second grade and is picked on by the rest of the second graders because he's a virgin. How as a Father can I help him?

Not so much on my side but against my ex.

I've tried everything, duct tape, large marshmallows, alcohol, and even smothering them with a pillow. I refuse to beat them, because I have a messed up shoulder and I won't be able to lift a beer after if I try it again. What should I do?

How do I explain to a 7 year old that light bulbs cost money and candles are just not safe in doghouses?

Advice appreciated. Thanks.

No son of mine is going to be a light weight drinker!

I have no idea what I'm doing.

I just read that we white people are going to be a minority by the time my baby is 30. Well, that's going to suck. My family has a long tradition of not being part of any minorities, and I'll be damned if my kid is going to be the first.

How do I turn my baby nonwhite, so he can continue to reap the fruits of majority status (and avoid his share of the payback we've surely got coming)? Do I just feed him a lot of ethnic foods?

Asking for a friend.

Why won't my son watch the pay per view porno's I purchased for him? All he wants to do is watch spongebob.. I'm beginning to get a little worried. He is turning 4 this year